The Side Quests

This week there has been very little that I would classify as an "easy" task. In fact, in order for things to run smoothly (or my variation of smoothly) I have spent several hours constructing the Rube Goldberg business model, in hopes of just accomplishing the simplest of tasks.

For example, the insurance company is asking for two quotes to replace the air conditioner at the 508 house.

The first was easy: Clay to the rescue!

Wednesday morning I called FIVE different companies before I found someone willing to give me a quote.

The first company: He and I couldn't get past the street address. The 508 home is located on a common Birmingham street. Say you lived in Chicago, you might have heard of Michigan Avenue? Say you lived in the Phoenix area, you might have heard of Camelback Road? Say you lived in New York, you might have heard of Broadway. Say you have a pulse in Birmingham, you should know this street name.

Second company: After I explained who I was and why I was calling, the woman who answered said: "You need to speak to my son. He won't be home for another hour from his other job." Apparently he does have an air conditioning service company on the side--or he does now because of the economy. He has a very pretty web site.

Third company: The woman's drawl was so thick I couldn't understand her. And, I rarely have this problem any more.

Fourth company: They are too busy to replace an air conditioner. Could I please call back next week?

Fifth company: Voicemail saying: Please leave a message as we are on vacation and the office is closed the fourth week of August. I ask you, what AC repair person goes on vacation in August?

Sending a letter firing the property management company should have been a simple task. Granted, I wanted to make sure my legal grounds were covered, so Carolsue, Paralegal Extraordinaire, wrote up my letter. However, she wasn't going to be my legal counsel if things get ugly. Therefore, I wanted to run it by Legal Eagle and give her a head's up.

However, when I called, I found out Legal Eagle no longer works at DFWLY Attorneys at Law. And, because Legal's former secretary has the personality and customer service skills of a belligerent pre-adolescent girl (Legal Eagle knows this too), there was no way she was going to provide me with any assistance or cooperation.

I did finally find Legal Eagle. She has looked over Carolsue's letter and gave her blessing.

Ms. Robin has been patiently waiting to get rid of the bees in her ceiling. The Bee Company doesn't do ceilings. The Drywall Company doesn't do bees. Finally, we found people who would do both with a smile. But they don't take out of state checks or credit cards.

Mrs. Waterford has moved out. Now that I no longer have the world's worst property management company to ignore this home, I still need a few tasks done--like showing it. So, I am actively looking for a way to get this done. Carolsue will do it if necessary, but it is pretty far.

It also needs the lawn mowed (too far for Billy) and some painting done. I have a few contacts on that side of the world, but I haven't heard back. In the mean time, I will just keep adding to my property management contraption, in anticipation of a well-oiled machine.