So after several maddening e-mails with Flunky the Maintenance Asshat today I finally told him that I pay the property management company to handle these kinds of things . And as soon as he has done his job to find out what is really going on, he can let me know so that I can make an informed decision about what to do about the hot water heater.
Five minutes later Flunky wrote me back and said "I just want to know if you want to call a plumber or should I?"
Frankly, I don't know if I need a plumber. For all I know the tenant is whining about nothing and wants to get out of her lease (that happens. Often.). Of course, if a plumber is needed he should call. That's why he is the Maintenance Guy.
Also, I had already covered that particular topic in other exchanges with him today. He has yet to tell me what "not hot enough water" happens to be. Instead of replying, I did what any sensible wife would do. I forwarded the e-mail to Marty Sunshine and said, "You deal with this and make sure he doesn't contact me about this again."
Wednesday, September 30, 2015
Close, But Not Close Enough
I just got a work order from Flunky the Maintenance Asshat. As usual he has usurped my repeated requests for him to work directly with Marty Sunshine. At this point I am convinced he only writes to me because because he has it out for me.
That's ok. I have it out for him too.
Apparently one of my tenants is in crisis. The work order said the tenant has hot water, but it isn't "hot enough". Flunky asked me what I wanted him to do about it.
I don't know, perhaps ask for a clarification to what "not hot enough" happens to mean? How long is this tenant running the hot water? How hot does she want the water? You know, so basics so that I can make an informed decision.
As politely as I could muster, I responded to Flunky by asking for clarification. I am guessing now this will turn into a complete pain in the neck that will make me crazy by Friday.
That's ok. I have it out for him too.
Apparently one of my tenants is in crisis. The work order said the tenant has hot water, but it isn't "hot enough". Flunky asked me what I wanted him to do about it.
I don't know, perhaps ask for a clarification to what "not hot enough" happens to mean? How long is this tenant running the hot water? How hot does she want the water? You know, so basics so that I can make an informed decision.
As politely as I could muster, I responded to Flunky by asking for clarification. I am guessing now this will turn into a complete pain in the neck that will make me crazy by Friday.
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Back at Square One
Now then, where did we leave off with the house in North Centerpoint?
You remember this drama don't you? This is the home where the mortgage was called due a year ago for some reason unbeknownst to us. In addition, the Bigoted Asset Manager's committee rejected all reasonable short sale offers--unless we agree to give them $36,000 more than we actually owe on the mortgage. After we agreed to disagree on this matter, the Bigoted Asset Manager then went back to the "committee" and asked if the bank would agree to a deed in lieu of foreclosure. Apparently this "committee" meets regularly, because not two days later the committee said no to this request too.
Actually, the day we got the rejection letter we also received another letter from the same mortgage company. The second letter was a demand for the full amount of the mortgage. The same mortgage they called due last year, and had they not, we could have been paying all along and never been in this situation. The mortgage company rejected our short sales. They have now rejected our request for a deed in lieu. But they want their money. Good luck with that. We don't have it.
I spoke to Legalowl right after I got the letter from the bank. She said to do nothing. She did suggest we keep the insurance and taxes up on the property. "It makes for a smoother transition." Whatever that means. This has been nothing but smooth. I also suspect if we don't pay the impounds the bank might move faster. But who knows.
Eventually someone at the bank is going to want this deadwood off their books. But until then, we will just let it sit there.
Monday, September 21, 2015
I Figure He Is Still Reading
So this past weekend Luigi contacted me and asked if I had any concerns about Flunky the Asshat Maintenance Manager. I have no idea what prompted his question or why he decided to ask little old me, but he did.
And, it just so happens I do have concerns. Lots of them. And I shared the ones I remembered off the top of my head with Luigi. If I had given myself some time, I would have come up with several more. I toyed with sending a "chapter 2" to Luigi or sending him copies of the crappy e-mails Flunky has sent me in the past year, but I didn't want to sound vindictive. I am guessing long about paragraph 10 of my dissertation Luigi was a bit sorry he brought this up.
In all fairness, I kept my comments neutral and factual. I left out the drama--except when Flunky contacted me at 5:21 a.m. and then told me it wasn't "urgent." Yea... I am still pissy about that.
And finally, I told Luigi I have left property management behind, and yet every call/text/e-mail from Flunky means I have to spend at the very minimum four hours of my time making sure I have the right person around to do the work because Flunky is short on customer service and feels entitled to spend my money any darn way he wants. If I wanted to spend four hours of my life fact-checking Flunky I could just manage my own properties and save myself a few dollars.
I did tell Luigi I very strongly feel there are probably many other owners who feel the same way I do. I also (rhetorically) questioned how many owners may have left this particular property management company just to be rid of Flunky. I summed up my thoughts by suggesting Flunky is harming Luigi's reputation as well as Luigi's company's reputation. Reputations are easy to destroy and hard to build.
Incidentally, I still haven't heard back from Luigi. That's fine. I have said my piece.
And, it just so happens I do have concerns. Lots of them. And I shared the ones I remembered off the top of my head with Luigi. If I had given myself some time, I would have come up with several more. I toyed with sending a "chapter 2" to Luigi or sending him copies of the crappy e-mails Flunky has sent me in the past year, but I didn't want to sound vindictive. I am guessing long about paragraph 10 of my dissertation Luigi was a bit sorry he brought this up.
In all fairness, I kept my comments neutral and factual. I left out the drama--except when Flunky contacted me at 5:21 a.m. and then told me it wasn't "urgent." Yea... I am still pissy about that.
And finally, I told Luigi I have left property management behind, and yet every call/text/e-mail from Flunky means I have to spend at the very minimum four hours of my time making sure I have the right person around to do the work because Flunky is short on customer service and feels entitled to spend my money any darn way he wants. If I wanted to spend four hours of my life fact-checking Flunky I could just manage my own properties and save myself a few dollars.
Incidentally, I still haven't heard back from Luigi. That's fine. I have said my piece.
Saturday, September 05, 2015
And Just To Be Sure
Right after I wrote the Bigoted Asset Manager, I forwarded Pam the Supervisor the same e-mail. Underneath it I attached several items of my ignored correspondence from the guy. Here's hoping this process moves a little faster from this point forward.
Friday, September 04, 2015
Bless His Bigoted, Cold, Rotten Heart
Our house in North Birmingham where we were trying to get a short sale got interesting. Since April, I had been talking to the Bigoted Asset Manager who had encouraged me to do a short sale. In fact, he blatantly discouraged me to let the house go into foreclosure.
When we first spoke in April, he suggested that the "committee" (???) would never "believe" Marty and I "needed a short sale" under the "circumstances". He said he was looking at our credit scores at that very moment and it would be a "hard sell" and didn't I just want to pay what I owe?
At the time, thinking I was working with a professional, I explained that the second mortgage had been called due--by his company and without any conceivable reason--starting this train wreck, the tenant had moved out and we were no longer in a position to take care of this house. The Bigoted Asset Manager made tut-tut noises and sent me on my way.
Four months later, Kirby submitted a total of four cash offers for our home to this bank. I had been speaking to the Bigoted Asset Manager all along. At one point, he sent me an e-mail offering me unreasonable terms to settle this account. We said no. Foreclose. The bigoted Asset Manager backed down, saying he would see what he could do.
What he did do was send me a lovely letter, via US Postal Service saying the "committee" rejected my short sale. What he also did was ignore my e-mails and phone calls for the following weeks.
Sick of the entire process, I sicced Marty on this. Last week Marty called around to this bank trying to find the person to talk to so that we could start the deed in lieu of foreclosure process. He left voicemail after voicemail. Finally someone named "Pam" called him back. Apparently Pam is a supervisor. She listened carefully as Marty relayed our story (we tried the short sale route and you folks rejected the offers we got.). Pam was none-too-happy we had jumped through so many hoops and promised to have someone call by the end of the day.
And someone did call. It was the Bigoted Asset Manager. On the phone with Marty, he was polite, reasonable and back-pedaled. It was clear that he and Pam had a terse conversation prior to him calling our home. Apparently at that particular moment he was more than willing to help us in any way.
However, when I found out Marty was on the phone with the guy, I was furious. He would return Marty's call, but not mine. I said loudly, "Is that the same Bigoted Asset Manager who refused to return my calls and e-mails for the past month but yet will call you back at the drop of a hat?"
At which point, Marty shot up a hand and gave me a look, begging me not to pick up the home extension and continue my tirade at the guy. Apparently the Bigoted Asset Manager heard me because Marty relayed the following message from him, "Thank you for being so professional Mrs. Landlord through the entire short sale process." And that just annoyed me further.
As it stands now, I believe the Bigoted Asset Manager is supposed to go back to the alleged "committee" and ask for guidance. We explained that we no longer had buyers for the house, so we would have to start over with another short sale--that is if Kirby is willing to do this again. After all, nobody likes working for free.
And just to be sure we are all on the same page, I e-mailed the jerk the following note:
When we first spoke in April, he suggested that the "committee" (???) would never "believe" Marty and I "needed a short sale" under the "circumstances". He said he was looking at our credit scores at that very moment and it would be a "hard sell" and didn't I just want to pay what I owe?
At the time, thinking I was working with a professional, I explained that the second mortgage had been called due--by his company and without any conceivable reason--starting this train wreck, the tenant had moved out and we were no longer in a position to take care of this house. The Bigoted Asset Manager made tut-tut noises and sent me on my way.
Four months later, Kirby submitted a total of four cash offers for our home to this bank. I had been speaking to the Bigoted Asset Manager all along. At one point, he sent me an e-mail offering me unreasonable terms to settle this account. We said no. Foreclose. The bigoted Asset Manager backed down, saying he would see what he could do.
What he did do was send me a lovely letter, via US Postal Service saying the "committee" rejected my short sale. What he also did was ignore my e-mails and phone calls for the following weeks.
Sick of the entire process, I sicced Marty on this. Last week Marty called around to this bank trying to find the person to talk to so that we could start the deed in lieu of foreclosure process. He left voicemail after voicemail. Finally someone named "Pam" called him back. Apparently Pam is a supervisor. She listened carefully as Marty relayed our story (we tried the short sale route and you folks rejected the offers we got.). Pam was none-too-happy we had jumped through so many hoops and promised to have someone call by the end of the day.
And someone did call. It was the Bigoted Asset Manager. On the phone with Marty, he was polite, reasonable and back-pedaled. It was clear that he and Pam had a terse conversation prior to him calling our home. Apparently at that particular moment he was more than willing to help us in any way.
However, when I found out Marty was on the phone with the guy, I was furious. He would return Marty's call, but not mine. I said loudly, "Is that the same Bigoted Asset Manager who refused to return my calls and e-mails for the past month but yet will call you back at the drop of a hat?"
At which point, Marty shot up a hand and gave me a look, begging me not to pick up the home extension and continue my tirade at the guy. Apparently the Bigoted Asset Manager heard me because Marty relayed the following message from him, "Thank you for being so professional Mrs. Landlord through the entire short sale process." And that just annoyed me further.
As it stands now, I believe the Bigoted Asset Manager is supposed to go back to the alleged "committee" and ask for guidance. We explained that we no longer had buyers for the house, so we would have to start over with another short sale--that is if Kirby is willing to do this again. After all, nobody likes working for free.
And just to be sure we are all on the same page, I e-mailed the jerk the following note:
Dear Bigoted Asset Manager,
Thank you for taking time to speak to my husband about our situation earlier this week. As he has a full time job, he still would like me to be the point of contact for this issue.
Would you please let me know what the next steps happen to be so that we can turn this home back over to the Bank. As your committee has rejected the four cash offers we brought you, it seems reasonable to expect a deed in lieu of foreclosure or a judicial foreclosure. We are more than willing to accommodate and save your company the trouble of a judicial foreclosure. So, if a deed in lieu works for you, that would be great with us.
Currently the home is vacant and probably vulnerable to vandalism and vagrancy, so moving forward and quickly as possible is probably in everyone's best interest.
Please advise soon.
Sincerely,
The Landlord
I know it is more wordy than "Bless your heart" but I sure hope it conveys the same sentiment.
Thursday, September 03, 2015
Mr. 114 to the Rescue
It is obvious that neither Flunky nor Marty are going to take care of the issue for the house in Fultondale. I am rather annoyed, but that is for another blog. The main issue is that the home is situated downhill and that happens to be the direction water flows when it rains.
Even in the South.
Because water flows downhill, it appears (according to the tenant who is squawking about this matter) it is somehow coming into the home. At one time I had the house sealed and drains put in to resolve this matter. The person who did it was Mr. 114, someone I know, trust and believe in. I don't trust or believe in Flunky the Maintenance Asshat who is in charge of finding someone to re-fix this issue.
Now before you suggest the obvious: why doesn't Mr. 114 go out there and fix the issue? After all, he did it once before and the problem has come back. There are two reasons. One, the scope of work he did last time did not include this area where water is coming in now. Think of it like this: if a roof has a leak, and it is patched it can still leak somewhere else at a later date. In this case, when Mr. 114 fixed the first water drainage issue, he shored up other potential areas of concern. But he didn't have a crystal ball on what would happen seven years in the future. If a tenant happens to plant or move earth or doesn't clean out the french drains on the property, water can be diverted and go somewhere else.
As I am not there and only hearing this second-hand, I don't know if the tenant has caused this or if there is an erosion issue. Right now, because Flunky is useless and won't tell me where the water is coming in ("I don't know but I will ask the contractor.") Mr. 114--who does this kind of thing for a living and is familiar with this house--is of the mind that the water may be coming in from under the porch, a place that was shored up at one time, but if the tenant moved things around it could be an issue now.
The other reason Mr. 114 doesn't want the job is because he lives 60 miles from this house. However, he has been a wealth of knowledge. And for that, I am grateful.
To speed things along, I recently asked Flunky for a new quote for this work. The first quote was more than I felt was reasonable. Instead of actually, you know, finding another quote, Flunky quickly told me "that is the best he can do."
As this issue was starting to get out of hand, I called Mr. 114. I asked him what he thought of my quote. And, Mr. 114 even called Flunky on my behalf to discuss this quote. When Mr. 114 called me, he didn't mince words. He said, "I don't' trust him and your quote is crap." That's what I was thinking too.
Apparently, Flunky's quote calls for only 8 feet of drain to be installed (for $2000????). The house is longer than 8 feet. So, installing culverts and drains for 8 feet will only divert the water so far before it pools up, causing more damage. There are other issues with the quote too. According to Mr. 114 the scope of the work I am being asked to pay for will do nothing to resolve the issue and only make things worse. And according to Mr. 114 he told Flunky to get another quote.
When I spoke with Mr. 114 yesterday, he told me not to proceed (no problem there, I don't have that kind of cash right now). He said wait for the new quote and immediately send it to him prior to agreeing to anything.
I am good with that.
Even in the South.
Because water flows downhill, it appears (according to the tenant who is squawking about this matter) it is somehow coming into the home. At one time I had the house sealed and drains put in to resolve this matter. The person who did it was Mr. 114, someone I know, trust and believe in. I don't trust or believe in Flunky the Maintenance Asshat who is in charge of finding someone to re-fix this issue.
Now before you suggest the obvious: why doesn't Mr. 114 go out there and fix the issue? After all, he did it once before and the problem has come back. There are two reasons. One, the scope of work he did last time did not include this area where water is coming in now. Think of it like this: if a roof has a leak, and it is patched it can still leak somewhere else at a later date. In this case, when Mr. 114 fixed the first water drainage issue, he shored up other potential areas of concern. But he didn't have a crystal ball on what would happen seven years in the future. If a tenant happens to plant or move earth or doesn't clean out the french drains on the property, water can be diverted and go somewhere else.
As I am not there and only hearing this second-hand, I don't know if the tenant has caused this or if there is an erosion issue. Right now, because Flunky is useless and won't tell me where the water is coming in ("I don't know but I will ask the contractor.") Mr. 114--who does this kind of thing for a living and is familiar with this house--is of the mind that the water may be coming in from under the porch, a place that was shored up at one time, but if the tenant moved things around it could be an issue now.
The other reason Mr. 114 doesn't want the job is because he lives 60 miles from this house. However, he has been a wealth of knowledge. And for that, I am grateful.
To speed things along, I recently asked Flunky for a new quote for this work. The first quote was more than I felt was reasonable. Instead of actually, you know, finding another quote, Flunky quickly told me "that is the best he can do."
As this issue was starting to get out of hand, I called Mr. 114. I asked him what he thought of my quote. And, Mr. 114 even called Flunky on my behalf to discuss this quote. When Mr. 114 called me, he didn't mince words. He said, "I don't' trust him and your quote is crap." That's what I was thinking too.
Apparently, Flunky's quote calls for only 8 feet of drain to be installed (for $2000????). The house is longer than 8 feet. So, installing culverts and drains for 8 feet will only divert the water so far before it pools up, causing more damage. There are other issues with the quote too. According to Mr. 114 the scope of the work I am being asked to pay for will do nothing to resolve the issue and only make things worse. And according to Mr. 114 he told Flunky to get another quote.
When I spoke with Mr. 114 yesterday, he told me not to proceed (no problem there, I don't have that kind of cash right now). He said wait for the new quote and immediately send it to him prior to agreeing to anything.
I am good with that.
A Third One on the Brink
One of our homes needs some maintenance. For the past two months, I have asked Marty Sunshine to work with Asshat the Maintenance Flunky in getting this done. There are a few reasons for this, primarily I just don't want to deal with Flunky and his maintenance requests. Frankly, anything related to Flunky just annoys the hell out of me.
Last April, two days into my vacation I spent a good 45 minutes in the Wal-Mart parking lot in Fort Stockton Texas, chewing out Flunky for being a liar. At the time, he really had no reasonable defense and didn't care much that I had caught him in lies that were detrimental to my business--which made me chew him out even more. Strangely enough, he took it from me. A few hours later, somewhere near Ozona Texas, he spoke with Marty and got another earful. Either the guy is just some sort of freak who gets his jollys from others yelling at him, or he is a serious dimwit. I am not betting money on which.
Moving right along, months ago, when these repair issues came into play, I made it perfectly clear: CONTACT MY HUSBAND ABOUT THIS HOUSE AND DON'T BOTHER ME. There were e-mails, which Flunky acknowledges ("Mrs. Landlord, I don't have Marty's e-mail address, will you send it to me again?" and "Mrs. Landlord is (your cell number) the best number to reach Marty?")
The other day I got an e-mail from Flunky: It said, "Your tenant is complaining that this work has not been done."
This was news to me. Marty had authorized Part A. Part B wasn't too bad and could wait. So what was the big deal? But because I was not in a saintly frame of mind, I responded with, "Your owner is complaining that the tenant is late on their rent, so nobody is happy right now." I also reminded him that concerning this house, Flunky was to go directly to Marty Sunshine and not involve me whatsoever.
But no. Flunky is an idiot. Instead, he sent me an e-mail saying, "It looks like they paid up," and then asked when we would authorize the work.
Because I am not a fool, I asked Marty to please call Flunky and get things straightened out. Flunky's story to Marty was different, they had not come up with the entire rent amount and when were we going to make all the repairs? So, not only did Flunky lie directly to me--the tenant is not paid up, but he didn't care that he lied to me.
As I explained to Marty, this tenant's lease is up in October. We can't afford to get the work done on this property without the rent money (which will pay for the work). If the tenants move out, we can't afford a vacant home AND the repairs we will need to get this place in order to rent. So, it might be best to see if the tenant is staying before we move forward. Otherwise, it will be the third home to go.
Moving right along, months ago, when these repair issues came into play, I made it perfectly clear: CONTACT MY HUSBAND ABOUT THIS HOUSE AND DON'T BOTHER ME. There were e-mails, which Flunky acknowledges ("Mrs. Landlord, I don't have Marty's e-mail address, will you send it to me again?" and "Mrs. Landlord is (your cell number) the best number to reach Marty?")
The other day I got an e-mail from Flunky: It said, "Your tenant is complaining that this work has not been done."
This was news to me. Marty had authorized Part A. Part B wasn't too bad and could wait. So what was the big deal? But because I was not in a saintly frame of mind, I responded with, "Your owner is complaining that the tenant is late on their rent, so nobody is happy right now." I also reminded him that concerning this house, Flunky was to go directly to Marty Sunshine and not involve me whatsoever.
But no. Flunky is an idiot. Instead, he sent me an e-mail saying, "It looks like they paid up," and then asked when we would authorize the work.
Because I am not a fool, I asked Marty to please call Flunky and get things straightened out. Flunky's story to Marty was different, they had not come up with the entire rent amount and when were we going to make all the repairs? So, not only did Flunky lie directly to me--the tenant is not paid up, but he didn't care that he lied to me.
As I explained to Marty, this tenant's lease is up in October. We can't afford to get the work done on this property without the rent money (which will pay for the work). If the tenants move out, we can't afford a vacant home AND the repairs we will need to get this place in order to rent. So, it might be best to see if the tenant is staying before we move forward. Otherwise, it will be the third home to go.
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