Sunday, I got the following e-mail from Ms. Betty:
"what do i do about my power bill if i pay u rent?
Essentially, she doesn't have the money to pay her rent and electric bill. What's a girl to do?
I didn't respond to Ms. Betty. But I will now.
Dear Ms. Betty,
Presumably, you asked my opinion about what you should do about paying your rent or paying your power bill. Let me simplify the decision process: it would be a waste of money to pay for electricity if you don't have a place to use it.
If that isn't motivation enough, I am chomping at the bit to get rid of you. My list of annoying tenants is diminishing and you are now close to the bottom. I need a hobby.
I understand times are tough. Guess what! They are tough for me too. Right now they are very tough. But I am not complaining to my mortgage company that I made the choice to have a gazillion homes in Alabama and now I have three vacant homes, a dead air conditioner, one deadbeat and one tenant who wants me to solve all of her financial hardships because she feels the need to choose between electricity and rent! These are my choices. I am sucking it up. I recommend you do the same.
But, how dare you make this my problem! I don't make my deadbeats your problem! I pay the mortgage--even when you are late. I hold up my end of the bargain. The bank isn't knocking on your door for the home back. You have a place to live.
If you need to come up with the money for the electricity, might I recommend taking on a part-time job, selling stuff on the Internet, cleaning houses, watching children or a variety of other innovative ways people on limited budgets throughout the world make ends meet. This isn't a unique situation.
I would like to caution you though, if something else mysteriously breaks in your home, I will not allow you or Mr. Betty to fix it. I will bring in Sid or Mr. 113. I am done.
Sincerely,
The Landlord
4 comments:
this reminds me of that scene on roseanne (i know, i'm dating myself *again*) where she talked about how she got a little extra money when she needed it - by sending the check for the power bill to the phone co. and the phone check to the power co., by sending unsigned checks, etc.
maybe you could e-mail a link to youtube to mrs. b. ;^)
I believe that same story line showed up on Laverne and Shirley. Now I am dating myself.
I used to do that trick back in college (when Laverne and Shirley weren't reruns). It worked great. However, I tried it a few years later and guess what? They've gotten wise to it. It no longer works, they just scratch through the power company's name and put their own name in there. Sucks. Maybe you should do like the power company. If you are habitually late, they charge you another deposit. Think of the money you'd be getting from these folks. Course, if they're habitually late, chances are they can't come up with another deposit. There are a couple of kinks to work out but by golly, I think it just might work!
Shlemeel! Shlemazel! Hasenfeffer corporated!
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