My Money's Worth

Might you remember Ms. Betty? For those of you new to Sage Business Central, you can pretty much hit any random blog in 2009 and probably the post will be about her. If you aren't that ambitious, think of this: take Hollywood's idea of an unsophisticated Southern woman, make a caricature of that, magnify the caricature, then subtract several IQ points, you have Ms. Betty.

By far, she was the most annoying tenant I had last year. She wrote me at least once a week asking for some inane solution to whatever her latest dilemma happened to be. She has a sense of entitlement and felt strongly that paying the rent was less important than paying the electric bill--both of which she didn't feel she needed to pay regularly.

In mid-August, she sent me half of the rent. I agreed to hold it with the promise from her that the remainder would be coming in two weeks. Three weeks later she was "shocked" I hadn't received the rent money, but made no effort to hunt down the errant check. I know if I am out that much money I would at least stop payment on my check--that is, if I wrote the check. And nobody actually believed she did. She also told me the first check was never any good to begin with (which didn't surprise me either).

In the end, I asked her to leave, which was a great relief to me. She left behind a hole where the six-month old dishwasher used to live and a lot of personal belongings under the crawlspace of the home, including a computer that had a file titled, "What's wrong with the landlord." But, she left, out of my life. More or less.

But, I held on to that original check. Every so often I would go to her bank and see if the check was good, knowing full well what the outcome would be. One time the teller strongly hinted that if I had gotten there a day earlier I could have cashed the check. So, money was flowing in and out of the account.

Finally, I just went ahead and cashed the check anyway. Three days after I went to the bank, I wrote her this e-mail, "I cashed your check. If it bounces I will go after you legally." It is a class B felony in Alabama to write a hot check.

Ms. Betty wrote back, "What check?"

I haven't replied yet. I am assuming she has figured out "What check?" by now. If not, her bank will let her know. Or, the sheriff will.

Marty Sunshine swearts he loves me despite what he calls a disturbing aspect of my personality. I say it isn't revenge, I am just cashing a check owed to me by a deadbeat.