Buyer Wanted

We are entering a new phase in the o'le accidental business. I am selling a house. This isn't like the short-sale selling, where the bank played games. Nor is it like the house in Leeds I have tried selling for years to an underwhelmed audience. Nope. I am really putting a house on the market. Sadly, I doubt I will make anything. In fact, I really don't want to sell it. The house cash flows. The tenant is questionable but clean. However, our lawyer has strongly advised us--and the bank who has the mortgage (and another home in foreclosure) is threatening us. So, we are selling.

Last I heard the tenant hadn't moved out just yet. I am so not surprised by this. Her sense of entitlement was high last winter when I suggested she get caught up on her rent or be evicted. I also know she had been asking to buy the house from me. That would have been just ducky on my part but the property management company seemed allergic to representing me in a sale. So, at this very moment, she isn't buying the house. I am going with the optimistic outlook that she really will be gone by the end of the month.

Who will be representing me in this sale, as of April 1 when the house is (hopefully) out of management is Kirby. For those of you who aren't in the loop, Kirby was my property manager for a long time. Then he wisely sold his company and pursued other lucrative adventures. Now he is my HVAC guy and realtor. He is also a quick text away when I need a referral Carolsue can't help me with.

This house--which is shaped like a barn, isn't in the worst neighborhood in the world. I would live there. And I guarantee there are houses I own I wouldn't live in. It will probably sit on the market for several months--despite being in (what I hope is) reasonable shape. Because that is what homes in Birmingham do. They sit for several months until an unsuspecting buyer comes along and makes a low-ball offer.

The house itself, has a lot to offer. It has a young roof. It has a six month old AC system. It is also a four bedroom, which is a rarity in the area. I expect to walk away when all is said and done paying off my loan and nothing else. The good news is I will have a great tax loss next year, because I am pretty much selling for what I owe, plus my expenses. That doesn't make me happy, but that is the free market. I bought at the wrong time.

The bad news is I am a terrible seller. Just like lawyers should never represent themselves and doctors should never diagnose themselves, real estate agents should never, ever, be sellers. We aren't good at it. Especially me.

Every showing that doesn't result in a sale is a personal rejection. With me way over here and Kirby way over there, I am sure I will want daily updates on what he is doing. Additionally, Kirby is one to sugar-coat. He and I have gone round and round about this for years: tell it like it is. It isn't a character flaw, it is a bad habit on his part (though he, being from the South, doesn't agree). And please add to the fact I am a somewhat high strung Type B, moderately uptight Type A wildly micromanaging Type A and Kirby is about as Type B as one can get and still be on this spectrum. He knows this about me. He is currently willing to work with me. Though perhaps as I write this post, he may be rethinking this.