Southern Extortion

I am being extorted by the City of Alabaster. Apparently they just figured out I own a rental home in their glorious town. According to their records, it has been a rental since 2008 and I owe them a substantial amount of money for every year since 2008. And, if I cheerfully pay up right now, they won't assess any back fees. How nice of them.

Actually, the home has been a rental longer than that. But why quibble?

The letter was signed by some coward called the "Revenue Department" who also said I was to fill out the enclosed form immediately. And, just to be utterly difficult, there is no form enclosed to fill out--though I did find a very poorly photocopied form on their Web site of what I believe the letter was talking about.

One of the most curious aspects of this particular letter is that the Revenue Department addressed their letter to the wrong business--my property management company and not the LLC that actually owns the rental. This is highly suspicious.

Because the company name is wrong on my letter, Marty Sunshine is surmising Ms. Shirley gave them an anonymous phone call about my home. I could see her being a big enough busy-body to do that. And yes, Ms. Shirley moved in around 2008.

I half-wonder if this is legitimate. Revenue Department? The company name wrong? No enclosed form attached? However, we are talking about Alabaster Alabama, the small town capital of the South. Things are more laid back. That could be why it took five-ish years for them to find me to begin with.

Just to cover my bases, I talked with Mr. Wonderful, my newest tenant in Alabaster. He is also a business owner, civic leader and a whole litany of other things--according to Mr. 114, who graciously gave me his resume when I was considering him as a tenant. Mr. Wonderful confirmed the letter is legit. And, it is probably best to just comply than to skirt around it.