I Am Pretty Sure He Only Listened When I Said I Am Buying Airfare

Luigi has passed me over to a new property manager dude at his office. And, because I am out of Mario the video game references (Mario, Luigi, Kirby and Daisy for those of you keeping track), we will just call this guy Slick Willy--or Willy for short.

Last week Willy and I played phone and e-mail tag, with him leaving me a message. Me returning it, giving him a reasonable range of when he could call to reach me and Willy ultimately ignoring my time frame and trying again when I was my most busy. Lather, rinse repeat.

Finally on Thursday we connected, with him beginning to tell me about what he felt needed to be "done" with my homes. I guess nobody over there warned him that I wasn't the average pushover, because he seemed a bit taken back when I corrected him and told him what I felt needed to be done with my homes.

First on my list is get my vacant one rented. Then find out why my tenant in Chalkville is moving next month and what can be done to keep her. Then update me on the eviction and destroyed home over there (I haven't written about that drama. Just not up to it right now). And then, when those meager tasks are complete, sell my home in Leeds. And, if possible, could you please give me comps on a couple of others. No hurry on the comps. I am just curious and would like someone else's opinion. What I didn't say was I wanted someone else's qualified opinion. But maybe I should have elaborated. My mistake.

Before hanging up, Willy shot through a good sixteen platitudes in about four minutes flat, promised me I would see all of the above and plenty more in my e-mail before close of business on Friday and wished me well. He may have sealed it with some sort of additional "you can count on me" speech. But I can't be sure.

I hung up our call with trepidation and fear, figuring that would be the last I would hear from Willy for a good three weeks. But, he didn't disappoint. He sent me all I asked for first thing Tuesday morning. Of course, unbeknown to him, I wasn't really available Tuesday morning. I was busy with 12 kids at a homeless shelter and didn't really get around to reading his e-mail until after noon some time.

Additionally, I hadn't exactly absorbed his e-mail when he called me an hour later with his version of great news. He had a buyer for my home in Moody. Yep. He found an investor who would buy it for $60k. He expected the contract any minute. Wasn't he just the best guy ever?

Maybe Willy is the best guy ever. Maybe he isn't. I do know nowhere did I say I wanted to give a home away for $60k. And yes, of course he could give me an offer on any of my homes at that price because it is worth significantly more than that.

When I started to explain to Willy I wasn't interested in selling the home in Moody for such a low price and I knew the house was worth more, he stopped me, giving me the same speech I share with those who think Zillow is a National treasure. Except I didn't use Zillow to find my comps. As a licensed agent, I have other tools at my disposal to run comps--even in other markets--which are more accurate than Zillow. Actually my cat could give more accurate comps than Zillow, but my true opinions of Zillow can wait until another blog.

Willy, who was expecting adulation and Heavenly praise for finding a buyer so fast for a home that wasn't in Leeds (and I didn't want to sell), took my reproach well. I did explain it wasn't my intention to professionally embarrass him by allowing him to find someone to bring me a low-ball offer (though I didn't "allow", but thought this might just ease the tension). I wanted a fair price for my homes. I don't want to give them away. Willy stammered though his explanation for way too long and I dropped it. I did suggest he could offer the same investor the home on Leeds, because that is the one I want sold. Just in case he missed that part of our conversation last week.

Willy didn't really have much else to say about my properties until I threw this bomb at him: I intend to fly out as soon as my eviction home is vacant. After a week of knowing this guy, I am thinking he would be much happier and would prefer I stayed right here.