Hmm... Maybe I Really Did Win The Alabama Lottery?

Let me back up a bit. A long time ago, I got a call from a woman who did not leave a name or phone number. The call came from an unidentified number, so there was absolutely no way to get back in touch with this woman even if I wanted to. The woman in question told me she was a lawyer and to call her back immediately or her "client" was suing me.

Once in a while I have also gotten phone calls from a variety of attorneys in the past. Generally the calls go like this, "Hello Mrs. Landlord, this is Prunella Jean McGillacutty, I am legal counsel for Mr. and Mrs. Jedidiah Wronged, I would like to discuss with you the impending situation and how we can come to a peaceful resolution. I would also be happy to discuss with Attorney Jon--your attorney of record--if you are unavailable or would prefer. I can be reached at...." (As a quick disclaimer, I have never been sued, nor do I do things to get me sued--but that doesn't stop those with a sense of entitlement from trying).

As you can see there is a big difference in quantity and quality of information. The first caller used words like "lawyer" and wanted to sue. The second one used words like "counsel" and "attorney." The second caller wanted solutions.

So then, fast forward to this past week. Though this could be about anything, because all his been eerily silent with Haroldine of late, I jumped to some conclusions. I got an unusual phone message from a 205 area code. It was a fast-talking, southern drawled woman who said, "Hello Landlord. My name is Roberta Rooster. You need to call me back." She didn't leave a number; she didn't give a reason.

Of course, I have her number from caller ID, but I don't have a compelling desire to run up my cell minutes talking to a stranger who couldn't be bothered to even give me a reason to call back. What I did find very interesting about Roberta's call was that I was given the option to reply via my voice mail--suggesting she had called me on a cell. Do attorneys call on cell phones at 2 in the afternoon?

Anyway, I decided to sleep on this latest crazy phone call and then I opted to do nothing. If this woman is a lawyer representing Haroldine, there is no case--Haroldine wasn't my tenant.

If she is an attorney representing Harold, I have a bigger issue--but the law is on my side. However, I would have to haul myself to Birmingham and spend more money than necessary to prove I am right--which I am.

I have no idea who this woman is and the reason she called. For all I know, she could be calling to tell me I won the Alabama lottery. However, I really don't feel like finding out. But more to the point, her phone was a catalyst to take care of something weighing on me. I sent Harold an accounting of everything paid in. I should have done it weeks ago. It was a pretty letter, with big, multi-syllable words with a twist of professional bitchy thrown in.

I should have sent it out weeks ago, once it appeared Haroldine was "confused" where Harold's deposit might have wandered off to. I made it very clear this time, there was no room for confusion.

I explained because they were late, they opted to move out instead of being evicted and because they left the place clean, I would not legally go after the remaining owed rent in form of a garnishment of Harold's wages. And no, they aren't getting their security deposit back, no matter how many names they call me.

Of course, when they were living there, I didn't use words like "eviction" and "garnishment." I merely suggested moving out because they couldn't afford to stay. That was cheaper (so far) and a lot less messy than an eviction. But the meaning then and now is the same.

Harold should be getting the copies of the letter via certified and regular mail early this week. I would like to believe the matter is now closed, but I am guessing Haroldine will be calling (or her friend Roberta) sometime soon.