Two unrelated and yet really cool things happened last week.
Mr. Partner sent me a card. He actually went to the store and spent money on a card for me. The effort alone is touching.
In the card he put a sweet note, thanking me for my role in our accidental business. It is his handwriting.
I am thinking of having this card bronzed.
Additionally, Bliz gave me the profit and loss statement for my S. corp this past week. I made a very, very small profit. My first profit! (insert happy dance here)
I even checked again later. Just in case I read it incorrectly the first 11 times. Diamond Jim tells me he needs to modify the financial statement a bit so it doesn't show any profit. But, whatever! I know the truth. I have witnesses.
I made a PROFIT!
Monday, April 12, 2010
Friday, April 09, 2010
The Cost of Doing Business
I had a long talk with Legal Eagle Monday morning. I wish we were talking about fun, friend-type things. But, we weren't. Instead I bought an hour of her time.
Among the more mundane topics we discussed was the property management company I hired and fired a month later and I are not seeing eye-to-eye. I had a long talk with the Alabama Real Estate Commission recently who gave me their opinion. On the record: there is nothing they can do. The property management company didn't break any laws--which is what the commission regulates. Off the record: the property management company are sleaze balls who have breached their fiduciary duties and I should go after them civilly. And seriously off the record: who the heck does a final walk-through with a tenant AND LETS THEM STAY IN THE HOUSE?? This property management company should be strung up and horse whipped.
Ok... I made up the strung up part. Instead, the guy at the Real Estate Commission just gave me a, "bless your heart," to encompass all of his feelings for the hell I went through. But I speak Southern well enough now that I know what he meant: strung up and horse whipped.
When Legal Eagle and I discussed, it really came to a few points. I probably would win, but it would cost me as much or more to fight them than I would recoup. It would be a hollow victory. Essentially, I would be suing on the principle of the matter. Never sue on principle. Instead, I am going to begrudgingly let Karma take care of this one.
Among the more mundane topics we discussed was the property management company I hired and fired a month later and I are not seeing eye-to-eye. I had a long talk with the Alabama Real Estate Commission recently who gave me their opinion. On the record: there is nothing they can do. The property management company didn't break any laws--which is what the commission regulates. Off the record: the property management company are sleaze balls who have breached their fiduciary duties and I should go after them civilly. And seriously off the record: who the heck does a final walk-through with a tenant AND LETS THEM STAY IN THE HOUSE?? This property management company should be strung up and horse whipped.
Ok... I made up the strung up part. Instead, the guy at the Real Estate Commission just gave me a, "bless your heart," to encompass all of his feelings for the hell I went through. But I speak Southern well enough now that I know what he meant: strung up and horse whipped.
When Legal Eagle and I discussed, it really came to a few points. I probably would win, but it would cost me as much or more to fight them than I would recoup. It would be a hollow victory. Essentially, I would be suing on the principle of the matter. Never sue on principle. Instead, I am going to begrudgingly let Karma take care of this one.
Thursday, April 08, 2010
Sadly, I was Actually Awake and Working
Ms. Kathy texted me on Tuesday at 5:41 a.m. She wanted to let me know she forgot to mail the rent check, so she was putting it in the mail today. She would overnight it.
There are so many things wrong with the paragraph above. First is the obvious 5:41 a.m. This is not an hour of the day I want to hear bad news. For that matter, it isn't a time I want to hear any news. I no longer bother with explaining time zones to tenants, as I figure if they have something to tell me, it is better that they just get it out of the way. But in this case, what would another hour or three hurt?
Of course the major faux pas with her message was that the rent wasn't in the mail. What I really didn't understand and mumbled to my phone as I read her note again, was how she could "forget" to mail the rent check? After I have given her a million breaks and changed her rent-due date? Was she just so used to having me hound her month after month she wasn't able to remember on her own? At any rate, kudos to Ms. Kathy for being proactive and contacting me first.
The last problem with her text might be harder to comprehend. Though this doesn't seem to be that much of an issue anywhere else, the post offices in the greater Phoenix metropolitan area tend to be crowded with those desperate to receive mail via inept government employees. Therefore, the lines tend to be long. An hour long.
Additionally there is a very nasty postal employee who works there. She derives a thrill from arbitrarily sending people to the back of the line when they haven't done her bidding. (You know, it is really too bad Seinfeld went off the air. This would have made a great episode.) If the long lines weren't enough to make me beg Ms. Kathy not to overnight her check to me, this woman's sinister bureaucratic methods (causing me to sleep with the night light) is enough for me to be willing to wait a few extra days.
Figuring the back story might give Ms. Kathy waaaayyy too much ammo, I just texted her back, relaying a simple: "Just put it in the regular mail. I will get it in a couple of days."
What I see here are the classic Mr. Richards syndrome. That being, ask for an inch but take a mile. Then, to make nice, torture me by sending the rent overnight. Mr. Richards seemed to think it would resolve a lot of ills to pop the rent in the overnight mail. Instead it just annoyed me further. Mr. Richards finally was asked to leave--just because I wasn't up to dealing with his shenanigans any more.
Don't go there Ms. Kathy.
There are so many things wrong with the paragraph above. First is the obvious 5:41 a.m. This is not an hour of the day I want to hear bad news. For that matter, it isn't a time I want to hear any news. I no longer bother with explaining time zones to tenants, as I figure if they have something to tell me, it is better that they just get it out of the way. But in this case, what would another hour or three hurt?
Of course the major faux pas with her message was that the rent wasn't in the mail. What I really didn't understand and mumbled to my phone as I read her note again, was how she could "forget" to mail the rent check? After I have given her a million breaks and changed her rent-due date? Was she just so used to having me hound her month after month she wasn't able to remember on her own? At any rate, kudos to Ms. Kathy for being proactive and contacting me first.
The last problem with her text might be harder to comprehend. Though this doesn't seem to be that much of an issue anywhere else, the post offices in the greater Phoenix metropolitan area tend to be crowded with those desperate to receive mail via inept government employees. Therefore, the lines tend to be long. An hour long.
Additionally there is a very nasty postal employee who works there. She derives a thrill from arbitrarily sending people to the back of the line when they haven't done her bidding. (You know, it is really too bad Seinfeld went off the air. This would have made a great episode.) If the long lines weren't enough to make me beg Ms. Kathy not to overnight her check to me, this woman's sinister bureaucratic methods (causing me to sleep with the night light) is enough for me to be willing to wait a few extra days.
Figuring the back story might give Ms. Kathy waaaayyy too much ammo, I just texted her back, relaying a simple: "Just put it in the regular mail. I will get it in a couple of days."
What I see here are the classic Mr. Richards syndrome. That being, ask for an inch but take a mile. Then, to make nice, torture me by sending the rent overnight. Mr. Richards seemed to think it would resolve a lot of ills to pop the rent in the overnight mail. Instead it just annoyed me further. Mr. Richards finally was asked to leave--just because I wasn't up to dealing with his shenanigans any more.
Don't go there Ms. Kathy.
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
Update
You know it will be a long day when the local Fox news shows up with a camera at your tenant's doorstep asking questions. If your tenant tells them to get the @!~%$* away from their home, all the reporter has to do is sweet talk the next door neighbor into letting them on to their property to film whatever it is they wish to film.
I know this first-hand. I also know what the "@!~%$*" stood for first-hand. In fact, I thought it was such a great sentiment I said the same thing when I found out the media had shown up.
This particular issue is playing a primary role in my life at the moment. It consumes too much of my time, cell minutes and stomach lining. And now I am relegated to sitting back helplessly and waiting. In the words of my friend Freedom, "I hate waiting."
I know this first-hand. I also know what the "@!~%$*" stood for first-hand. In fact, I thought it was such a great sentiment I said the same thing when I found out the media had shown up.
This particular issue is playing a primary role in my life at the moment. It consumes too much of my time, cell minutes and stomach lining. And now I am relegated to sitting back helplessly and waiting. In the words of my friend Freedom, "I hate waiting."
The VP of Marketing
The former air conditioning company has been calling me. Often.
They keep telling me I have a service agreement with them. And, it is time for my home's annual air conditioning tune-up. They are right on one account: it is time for my home's annual tune-up.
Ronnie seems to be my new contact over there. He tells me he works in the "marketing department" of this air conditioning company. Maybe it is a Southern thing, but I know of no HVAC company here with a "marketing department." But then again, HVAC companies out here don't really need one. And, with all due respect to Ronnie, he has led me to believe that his stellar accomplishment of completing the fifth grade in three years was the highlight of his life.
Ronnie calls me once every few days to remind me of my service agreement and tune-up. What disturbs me more than anything is that Ronnie doesn't seem to remember he and I have had the same conversation for the past five months.
Our conversation usually goes like this:
Ronnie: "Y'all got a service agreement with us. It is time for your annual air conditioning maintenance."
Me: "I believe you are mistaken. I don't have a service agreement with you."
Ronnie: "Yes ma'am. I am holding it in my hand as we speak."
Me: "I don't have a copy of this. Would you fax it over?"
We then go through this, "Yes ma'am. What is your fax number" type thing--which amazes me, because I have given him the number about 12 times. Ronnie will then tell me he is faxing it. I will hang up, because experience tells me otherwise he will put me on hold for 23 minutes, wasting my cell minutes and my patience. When he calls back we start up again.
Ronnie: "I think we got cut off."
Me: "No I hung up. Are you going to be faxing me the agreement?"
Ronnie: (with--I swear--mock surprise): "Y'all haven't gotten it? I just faxed it. I have the confirmation slip in my hand."
Me: "Nope. I am sitting right here next to the fax machine. Nothing has come through."
Ronnie: "Do you want to check again?"
Me: "I am sitting right next to the fax machine. I can turn my head and see there is nothing on it. Besides, the line hasn't rung."
Ronnie (who at this point pauses for a bit of drama, I think he is expecting to come across as confused): "Well, I will send it again. Can you hold?"
We then part ways, and, next time I choose to answer the phone, we will do it all over again.
Neither Ronnie and I have yet to figure out which home Ronnie is referring to. Like most of our chats, everything seems to fall on the esoteric side of the fence. I have asked which home many times before, but he always threatens to put me on hold if I really want any concrete answers.
Last time Ronnie called, I told him if he was having such problems faxing my service agreement to me, perhaps he could just stick it in the mail? Frankly, Ronnie seemed relieved with that idea, but didn't ask me for an address. So far, nothing has shown up. Or, maybe he sent it to a random rental home--in which case, I may never see it.
That said, if I discover I did pay for a service agreement, I will be getting my money back. But I doubt I did. I suspect this is just a way to get out to any random rental home and find something wrong with my AC unit.
For now, I find the entire incident amusing. But, if Ronnie annoys me too much, I may just tell him the sad truth: I ended up buying three air conditioning units last summer. Ronnie's company didn't install any of them.
They keep telling me I have a service agreement with them. And, it is time for my home's annual air conditioning tune-up. They are right on one account: it is time for my home's annual tune-up.
Ronnie seems to be my new contact over there. He tells me he works in the "marketing department" of this air conditioning company. Maybe it is a Southern thing, but I know of no HVAC company here with a "marketing department." But then again, HVAC companies out here don't really need one. And, with all due respect to Ronnie, he has led me to believe that his stellar accomplishment of completing the fifth grade in three years was the highlight of his life.
Ronnie calls me once every few days to remind me of my service agreement and tune-up. What disturbs me more than anything is that Ronnie doesn't seem to remember he and I have had the same conversation for the past five months.
Our conversation usually goes like this:
Ronnie: "Y'all got a service agreement with us. It is time for your annual air conditioning maintenance."
Me: "I believe you are mistaken. I don't have a service agreement with you."
Ronnie: "Yes ma'am. I am holding it in my hand as we speak."
Me: "I don't have a copy of this. Would you fax it over?"
We then go through this, "Yes ma'am. What is your fax number" type thing--which amazes me, because I have given him the number about 12 times. Ronnie will then tell me he is faxing it. I will hang up, because experience tells me otherwise he will put me on hold for 23 minutes, wasting my cell minutes and my patience. When he calls back we start up again.
Ronnie: "I think we got cut off."
Me: "No I hung up. Are you going to be faxing me the agreement?"
Ronnie: (with--I swear--mock surprise): "Y'all haven't gotten it? I just faxed it. I have the confirmation slip in my hand."
Me: "Nope. I am sitting right here next to the fax machine. Nothing has come through."
Ronnie: "Do you want to check again?"
Me: "I am sitting right next to the fax machine. I can turn my head and see there is nothing on it. Besides, the line hasn't rung."
Ronnie (who at this point pauses for a bit of drama, I think he is expecting to come across as confused): "Well, I will send it again. Can you hold?"
We then part ways, and, next time I choose to answer the phone, we will do it all over again.
Neither Ronnie and I have yet to figure out which home Ronnie is referring to. Like most of our chats, everything seems to fall on the esoteric side of the fence. I have asked which home many times before, but he always threatens to put me on hold if I really want any concrete answers.
Last time Ronnie called, I told him if he was having such problems faxing my service agreement to me, perhaps he could just stick it in the mail? Frankly, Ronnie seemed relieved with that idea, but didn't ask me for an address. So far, nothing has shown up. Or, maybe he sent it to a random rental home--in which case, I may never see it.
That said, if I discover I did pay for a service agreement, I will be getting my money back. But I doubt I did. I suspect this is just a way to get out to any random rental home and find something wrong with my AC unit.
For now, I find the entire incident amusing. But, if Ronnie annoys me too much, I may just tell him the sad truth: I ended up buying three air conditioning units last summer. Ronnie's company didn't install any of them.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
That Whole Burning the Candle At Both Ends Thing Is Getting a Tad Out of Hand
It is no secret I have gone back to working full time. And, yes, I still homeschool. I miss my friends, my free time and my sanity. But thanks to the likes of some bad decisions early on--not to mention Mr. Richards, Wayward and Mr. Smith, we are pretty much out of capital. I am not complaining. I chose these decisions. And, what does not kill me... yada yada.
But a few things are falling through the cracks. Like depositing rents. Last week the bank sweetly told me I bounced four mortgage payments. Not because we didn't have the money, but because it slipped my mind to transfer it to the right account. My bad. (And might I say, Gina at my bank totally rocks! She saved me from having to send Mr. Partner an embarrassing e-mail.)
Last Friday it occurred to me that it was April. Tax season is here. I hadn't heard from Diamond Jim, my totally awesome CPA, in a month. And Mr. Partner has been uncharacteristically quiet about wanting his K-1 statement. So, I completely forgot about it until the other day when Jim called. I have to say, being preoccupied has made the waiting easier.
Unsurprising to anyone, my desk threw up recently. When I cleaned it I found a bill that wasn't due just yet. But I paid it anyway--just to be ahead of the game. And, just because I was afraid I would forget later, I sat down right there and then and sent Bliz a note, telling her it was paid. Early. Efficiency is a bit easier when there is no spare time.
I haven't had a lot of time to deal with Jack selling our home. I checked Craig's list the other day and didn't see it posted, so I went ahead and just did it. Normally I would have called him and asked if I missed it, not to micro-manage, but to make sure I wasn't duplicating his efforts. But this time I figured if I missed the ad, it wouldn't hurt for another ad to run. And if he didn't do it, he would never know I knew.
I certainly don't have room in my life for run-of-the-mill tenant drama at this moment. Which comes in handy when I don't have the energy to feel sorry for anyone who is coming up short on the rent. But it seems the forces of nature have been paying attention. They haven't really granted me any minor tenant drama in a while. And I appreciate my tenants behaving.
Of course, I haven't really been handling the laundry much either...
But a few things are falling through the cracks. Like depositing rents. Last week the bank sweetly told me I bounced four mortgage payments. Not because we didn't have the money, but because it slipped my mind to transfer it to the right account. My bad. (And might I say, Gina at my bank totally rocks! She saved me from having to send Mr. Partner an embarrassing e-mail.)
Last Friday it occurred to me that it was April. Tax season is here. I hadn't heard from Diamond Jim, my totally awesome CPA, in a month. And Mr. Partner has been uncharacteristically quiet about wanting his K-1 statement. So, I completely forgot about it until the other day when Jim called. I have to say, being preoccupied has made the waiting easier.
Unsurprising to anyone, my desk threw up recently. When I cleaned it I found a bill that wasn't due just yet. But I paid it anyway--just to be ahead of the game. And, just because I was afraid I would forget later, I sat down right there and then and sent Bliz a note, telling her it was paid. Early. Efficiency is a bit easier when there is no spare time.
I haven't had a lot of time to deal with Jack selling our home. I checked Craig's list the other day and didn't see it posted, so I went ahead and just did it. Normally I would have called him and asked if I missed it, not to micro-manage, but to make sure I wasn't duplicating his efforts. But this time I figured if I missed the ad, it wouldn't hurt for another ad to run. And if he didn't do it, he would never know I knew.
I certainly don't have room in my life for run-of-the-mill tenant drama at this moment. Which comes in handy when I don't have the energy to feel sorry for anyone who is coming up short on the rent. But it seems the forces of nature have been paying attention. They haven't really granted me any minor tenant drama in a while. And I appreciate my tenants behaving.
Of course, I haven't really been handling the laundry much either...
Monday, April 05, 2010
My Day Off
Today is the first day of the 2010 baseball season. First pitch is at 2:10. My brother and I will be there to watch Danny Haren do what he does best. Marty Sunshine has graciously agreed to come home from work early and watch the kids so I can make this happen.
If anything weird with my rental homes happens in Alabama today, I am off the clock.
Besides, what could possibly happen?
Saturday, April 03, 2010
The Seller In Me
Jack sent me a note. We have had no activity on our home. There is a sign in the front yard. Jack is doing all the real estate agent-y things.
And now I am doing all the seller-y things. I am questioning. Second guessing. Wondering. However, I am not doing these to Jack. I am doing these internally.
Marty Sunshine recently reminded me that everything happens when it is supposed to happen. Which is really nice to hear when you don't have your seller hat on. It is fluffy bunk when you do.
I did ask Jack what he thinks the next steps are. Do we lower the price? Switch automatically to making this a rental again? Or, do we stay the course?
Jack said stay the course.
I trust his judgement. I trust him.
And now I am doing all the seller-y things. I am questioning. Second guessing. Wondering. However, I am not doing these to Jack. I am doing these internally.
Marty Sunshine recently reminded me that everything happens when it is supposed to happen. Which is really nice to hear when you don't have your seller hat on. It is fluffy bunk when you do.
I did ask Jack what he thinks the next steps are. Do we lower the price? Switch automatically to making this a rental again? Or, do we stay the course?
Jack said stay the course.
I trust his judgement. I trust him.
Friday, April 02, 2010
The How-To-Be-A-Landlord Books Don't Seem to Touch Upon This
Today's public service announcement is for those of you who own rental properties where the Powers-That-Be think the person who lived there before your current tenant may be involved in shady activities with seedy outcomes.
Now, I should preface, in my situation, I did have some notice that the Powers-That-Be had an interest in my home. Because of this, I was able to give this some thought ahead of time to what actions might be necssary. I have also have enough public relations experience to have a decent idea of how this could pan out if there is an undesirable outcome (which is inconclusive at this moment and probably won't be completed for a few more weeks).
But just like the nuclear bomb drills in the 1950s, it just isn't the same as actually having to live through last weekend's ordeal while it is happening. In this case, the notice gave me time to warn those who needed to be warned, but did little else. Nor did the fair warning really have the appropriate impact living through the actual event happening would have.
At any rate, in the event you somehow manage to find yourself in this situation (which I certainly don't wish upon you), here are a few things that might come in handy.
1. Have a Legal Eagle. Give her a prepared statement of "the owners have no comment to make" or something equally innocuous. In my case my "prepared statement" was a quick comment last I spoke with her. She can fill in the blanks if it ever comes up.
2. If you have a Mr. Partner in your life, be sure to tell him about his early on. Especially if the home is in his name. Remind him not to talk to anyone. Remind him to give Legal Eagle's phone number to anyone who may ask.
3. Be prepared to smooth over any wrinkles with your current tenant. Because, I assure you first hand, the tenant will be none-too-happy. I promise. The tenant doesn't have to cooperate with the Powers-That-Be. But, it is nice if they do. Because if they don't, the Powers-That-Be can get a warrant and do what they want anyway.
4. Assume the tenant will talk to the neighbors. There is nothing you can do about it. Just wishing your tenant won't be chatty will do you no good. Begging your tenant not to discuss this won't work either. It is a given fact everyone on your block will know about this. If/when your tenant moves out, your future tenants will know about this too.
5. Realize the Powers-That-Be might be digging a 5 foot deep hole in your back yard. Hopefully the Powers-That-Be will also be willing to put the dirt back when they are done. Hopefully, but it isn't a given. You may be stuck with a 5 foot deep hole and maybe even yellow tape around it.
6. Assume if something is discovered by the Powers-That-Be the press might be interested. If so, see Numbers 1, 2, and 4. So far I haven't had to worry about this one.
7. If the case is high-profile, there might be well meaning people who might want to stop by and drop off teddy bears and flowers in your tenant's front yard, thinking it is some sort of shrine. Be prepared. Though I have to tell you, I haven't mentioned that part to my tenant.
8. Don't expect to feel wonderful about the experience. Helping someone find the answers about a loved one doesn't necessarily have the same altruistic wonderful glow of say, walking a grandmother across the street or saving an orphan from a burning building. In fact, I can say it is more of a feeling of profound sadness coupled by a sickly feeling growing in the pit of my stomach each day that even a fabulous vacation or a winning baseball season just won't fix.
Now, I should preface, in my situation, I did have some notice that the Powers-That-Be had an interest in my home. Because of this, I was able to give this some thought ahead of time to what actions might be necssary. I have also have enough public relations experience to have a decent idea of how this could pan out if there is an undesirable outcome (which is inconclusive at this moment and probably won't be completed for a few more weeks).
But just like the nuclear bomb drills in the 1950s, it just isn't the same as actually having to live through last weekend's ordeal while it is happening. In this case, the notice gave me time to warn those who needed to be warned, but did little else. Nor did the fair warning really have the appropriate impact living through the actual event happening would have.
At any rate, in the event you somehow manage to find yourself in this situation (which I certainly don't wish upon you), here are a few things that might come in handy.
1. Have a Legal Eagle. Give her a prepared statement of "the owners have no comment to make" or something equally innocuous. In my case my "prepared statement" was a quick comment last I spoke with her. She can fill in the blanks if it ever comes up.
2. If you have a Mr. Partner in your life, be sure to tell him about his early on. Especially if the home is in his name. Remind him not to talk to anyone. Remind him to give Legal Eagle's phone number to anyone who may ask.
3. Be prepared to smooth over any wrinkles with your current tenant. Because, I assure you first hand, the tenant will be none-too-happy. I promise. The tenant doesn't have to cooperate with the Powers-That-Be. But, it is nice if they do. Because if they don't, the Powers-That-Be can get a warrant and do what they want anyway.
4. Assume the tenant will talk to the neighbors. There is nothing you can do about it. Just wishing your tenant won't be chatty will do you no good. Begging your tenant not to discuss this won't work either. It is a given fact everyone on your block will know about this. If/when your tenant moves out, your future tenants will know about this too.
5. Realize the Powers-That-Be might be digging a 5 foot deep hole in your back yard. Hopefully the Powers-That-Be will also be willing to put the dirt back when they are done. Hopefully, but it isn't a given. You may be stuck with a 5 foot deep hole and maybe even yellow tape around it.
6. Assume if something is discovered by the Powers-That-Be the press might be interested. If so, see Numbers 1, 2, and 4. So far I haven't had to worry about this one.
7. If the case is high-profile, there might be well meaning people who might want to stop by and drop off teddy bears and flowers in your tenant's front yard, thinking it is some sort of shrine. Be prepared. Though I have to tell you, I haven't mentioned that part to my tenant.
8. Don't expect to feel wonderful about the experience. Helping someone find the answers about a loved one doesn't necessarily have the same altruistic wonderful glow of say, walking a grandmother across the street or saving an orphan from a burning building. In fact, I can say it is more of a feeling of profound sadness coupled by a sickly feeling growing in the pit of my stomach each day that even a fabulous vacation or a winning baseball season just won't fix.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Things Can Only Go Up from Here
I am not making this up--though I wish I was.
There were search dogs at my rental home this past weekend.
The folks who did the actual searching are pretty non-committal about their findings, though they were there for 5 hours--which strikes me as a bit more committal than not.
I am also told they aren't done with their search and are planning to come back again.
On a possibly unrelated note, I am ready for a vacation. Or at least baseball season.
There were search dogs at my rental home this past weekend.
The folks who did the actual searching are pretty non-committal about their findings, though they were there for 5 hours--which strikes me as a bit more committal than not.
I am also told they aren't done with their search and are planning to come back again.
On a possibly unrelated note, I am ready for a vacation. Or at least baseball season.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Leasing 101
I am sure you might have guessed I have a few opinions about first impressions. I don't expect anyone to show up to rent a home with a suit and tie. But I expect a few general common sense guidelines that I would guess anyone raised half-right could figure out. Essentially, it boils down to: in the landlord-tenant game, let the other party know they can count on you.
Because I have been working full time in the Phoenix real estate gig for the past few months, I have seen my fair share of folks looking for a place to live. The ones who come to me, asking me to represent them, don't seem to understand--the property manager will ask my opinion of my clients when she sells them to the landlord. So, if I find that I might have trouble saying nice things about them, I don't take them on as my clients.
A few things I have seen of late:
If you haven't paid your mortgage for a year and the bank is auctioning your home this Friday, don't expect a landlord/property management company to be all that impressed with your planning abilities. Nor your sense of entitlement. I understand homes go into foreclosure and we are in interesting finanical times. I don't lack compassion for your overall situation. However, if you purposely STAY IN YOUR HOME WITHOUT MAKING A PAYMENT FOR 12 MONTHS, you are stealing. Bow out with some dignity. We all comprehend the state of the economy is different than what it used to be. But we don't all get your inability to move on or the lack of foresight to find a place to live moments before the bank shows up.
If you have $100,000 in credit card debt, and a good credit score, you are still a financial risk. Bankruptcy laws may have changed, but you still can walk away from this. Landlords know it. Landlords will still see you as a risk. If you think you can hide this from me, the person representing you, or the person who runs your credit, we will still find out. And neither of us will be happy to be blind-sided with this tid-bit when selling you to a landlord.
If you need a place to live, please do not call me insinuating I am only giving you rental listings above your drop-dead rental budget. Guess what! There are NO 2,000 square foot homes built in the past five years where you want to live renting for $800 a month. I am not paid extra because I am showing you the $900, 1,400 square foot homes. Honest.
If you are a Landlord and you want your home rented. May I suggest cleaning it up. If you you want someone with standards to live in your home, show them the kind of standards they need to have. If there are broken items in your home that might affect a potential tenant's quality of life, fix them. Does the future car of your dreams have missing breaks, steering wheel and flat tires? Why do you think a future tenant wants to live with broken windows, holes in the walls and dirty carpet?
Also, if you are a landlord and homes are renting for $300 less than what you are asking for the same sized home in the same neighborhood, it stands to reason you just look like a clown. A renter doesn't care that your home has one more linen closet than the one across the street. I swear. They don't. It doesn't make up for a $300 price increase either. I promise.
And last but not least, we talk. In the years I have been handling real estate, I have met several of the Valley's property managers. I am not about to risk my reputation with a property manager on a tenant who doesn't tell the truth. Nor am I going to refer a landlord to a property management company if they aren't willing to provide a quality home.
Because I have been working full time in the Phoenix real estate gig for the past few months, I have seen my fair share of folks looking for a place to live. The ones who come to me, asking me to represent them, don't seem to understand--the property manager will ask my opinion of my clients when she sells them to the landlord. So, if I find that I might have trouble saying nice things about them, I don't take them on as my clients.
A few things I have seen of late:
If you haven't paid your mortgage for a year and the bank is auctioning your home this Friday, don't expect a landlord/property management company to be all that impressed with your planning abilities. Nor your sense of entitlement. I understand homes go into foreclosure and we are in interesting finanical times. I don't lack compassion for your overall situation. However, if you purposely STAY IN YOUR HOME WITHOUT MAKING A PAYMENT FOR 12 MONTHS, you are stealing. Bow out with some dignity. We all comprehend the state of the economy is different than what it used to be. But we don't all get your inability to move on or the lack of foresight to find a place to live moments before the bank shows up.
If you have $100,000 in credit card debt, and a good credit score, you are still a financial risk. Bankruptcy laws may have changed, but you still can walk away from this. Landlords know it. Landlords will still see you as a risk. If you think you can hide this from me, the person representing you, or the person who runs your credit, we will still find out. And neither of us will be happy to be blind-sided with this tid-bit when selling you to a landlord.
If you need a place to live, please do not call me insinuating I am only giving you rental listings above your drop-dead rental budget. Guess what! There are NO 2,000 square foot homes built in the past five years where you want to live renting for $800 a month. I am not paid extra because I am showing you the $900, 1,400 square foot homes. Honest.
If you are a Landlord and you want your home rented. May I suggest cleaning it up. If you you want someone with standards to live in your home, show them the kind of standards they need to have. If there are broken items in your home that might affect a potential tenant's quality of life, fix them. Does the future car of your dreams have missing breaks, steering wheel and flat tires? Why do you think a future tenant wants to live with broken windows, holes in the walls and dirty carpet?
Also, if you are a landlord and homes are renting for $300 less than what you are asking for the same sized home in the same neighborhood, it stands to reason you just look like a clown. A renter doesn't care that your home has one more linen closet than the one across the street. I swear. They don't. It doesn't make up for a $300 price increase either. I promise.
And last but not least, we talk. In the years I have been handling real estate, I have met several of the Valley's property managers. I am not about to risk my reputation with a property manager on a tenant who doesn't tell the truth. Nor am I going to refer a landlord to a property management company if they aren't willing to provide a quality home.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Random Bama
Ms. Kathy sent me a high priority text at 5 A.M. the other day. The loose brick front steps that I discovered when I snuck up on her during my visit have been fixed--last week.
Frankly, I am glad she is speaking to me after my idiotic moment. It almost makes up for my phone ringing at 5 a.m. Almost.
________________________________
No word from Jack on our house for sale. I am so busy with other things that I have forgotten to stress about it. Until now.
________________________________
For the past several months the HVAC company I haven't used in almost a year has been calling me telling me it is time for a service on one of my homes. They tell me I paid for a service agreement--which I know darn well I did not. Or at least not on purpose.
Every time they call, I ask them to fax me this alleged agreement so I can see for myself. Every time they promise me they will send it and it has yet to come. I want it so I can ask for my money back. Because if I find out I paid for one, but I sure didn't authorize it.
_________________________________
Ms. Angela is unemployed and has lots of free time on her hands. I was caught off guard when she called me Friday to chat.
Also, I have gotten too many "forward this to everyone you know so you can annoy them and your wish will come true by 10:07 a.m. January 12, 2015 and if you don't your friends won't know how totally awesome you are because you didn't annoy them by forwarding this e-mail to you..." e-mails.
Sorry I didn't forward them to you. I am just not feeling totally awesome today.
_________________________________
Mr. Partner sent a sweet note, thanking me for all I do.
What is really cool is that it was unsolicited and this time it did not come as a result of Marty Sunshine's sudden confession that he found me in the throes of a nervous breakdown at the base of the stairs because I cracked under the stress. Things are looking up!
Frankly, I am glad she is speaking to me after my idiotic moment. It almost makes up for my phone ringing at 5 a.m. Almost.
________________________________
No word from Jack on our house for sale. I am so busy with other things that I have forgotten to stress about it. Until now.
________________________________
For the past several months the HVAC company I haven't used in almost a year has been calling me telling me it is time for a service on one of my homes. They tell me I paid for a service agreement--which I know darn well I did not. Or at least not on purpose.
Every time they call, I ask them to fax me this alleged agreement so I can see for myself. Every time they promise me they will send it and it has yet to come. I want it so I can ask for my money back. Because if I find out I paid for one, but I sure didn't authorize it.
_________________________________
Ms. Angela is unemployed and has lots of free time on her hands. I was caught off guard when she called me Friday to chat.
Also, I have gotten too many "forward this to everyone you know so you can annoy them and your wish will come true by 10:07 a.m. January 12, 2015 and if you don't your friends won't know how totally awesome you are because you didn't annoy them by forwarding this e-mail to you..." e-mails.
Sorry I didn't forward them to you. I am just not feeling totally awesome today.
_________________________________
Mr. Partner sent a sweet note, thanking me for all I do.
What is really cool is that it was unsolicited and this time it did not come as a result of Marty Sunshine's sudden confession that he found me in the throes of a nervous breakdown at the base of the stairs because I cracked under the stress. Things are looking up!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
He's the University of Alabama's Football Coach
Just like with everything else in life, experiences are all connected (thanks to my cyber-friend Lori for pointing that out). My accidental business transcends into all I do and into my daily life. I don't seek out all things Alabama. Instead, my experiences connect me to other experiences--which make me into who I am. I started thinking about this particular concept this week.
My connections:
I know more about Alabama horticulture than I ever expected to know. Did you know that hydrangea flowers become colorful if you add iron to the soil? Did you know that the botanical gardens in Hoover Alabama is the creator of a new breed of hydrangea? Did you know one of those hydrangea bushes are going to be residing at one of my rental homes?
I never expected to know the mechanics of how a roof works, how to install a dishwasher and how door lock technology has evolved in the past 40 years. Yet I am set if there is a Trivial Pursuit category for this.
Southern culture fascinates me, not because I am a big Gone With The Wind fan, but because I had to learn how to do business over there. Recently I had a grotesquely unpleasant encounter with another home school mother. When we were at an en pass and I realized that she had no room in her life for compassion or another opinion, I was able to say, "Bless your heart. Thank you for opening my eyes." She responded with, "Of course! You are very welcome," completely clueless of the subtext.
The plural of "y'all" is "all'y'all." And, that is the way it is spelled. People who aren't from the South aren't allowed to say "all'y'all." It is like the nerdy kid trying too hard to fit in with the cool clique.
If you asked me when I graduated from college if I would ever know the ins and outs of pop music publishing, the dirty secrets car dealerships don't want you to know and who Nick Saban happens to be, I would have looked at you like you were nuts. Why would I want to know these things? All of them I learned from managing rental homes in Alabama.
I learned of lots of other business-y things too. But those are for a few other blogs.
My connections:
I know more about Alabama horticulture than I ever expected to know. Did you know that hydrangea flowers become colorful if you add iron to the soil? Did you know that the botanical gardens in Hoover Alabama is the creator of a new breed of hydrangea? Did you know one of those hydrangea bushes are going to be residing at one of my rental homes?
I never expected to know the mechanics of how a roof works, how to install a dishwasher and how door lock technology has evolved in the past 40 years. Yet I am set if there is a Trivial Pursuit category for this.
Southern culture fascinates me, not because I am a big Gone With The Wind fan, but because I had to learn how to do business over there. Recently I had a grotesquely unpleasant encounter with another home school mother. When we were at an en pass and I realized that she had no room in her life for compassion or another opinion, I was able to say, "Bless your heart. Thank you for opening my eyes." She responded with, "Of course! You are very welcome," completely clueless of the subtext.
The plural of "y'all" is "all'y'all." And, that is the way it is spelled. People who aren't from the South aren't allowed to say "all'y'all." It is like the nerdy kid trying too hard to fit in with the cool clique.
If you asked me when I graduated from college if I would ever know the ins and outs of pop music publishing, the dirty secrets car dealerships don't want you to know and who Nick Saban happens to be, I would have looked at you like you were nuts. Why would I want to know these things? All of them I learned from managing rental homes in Alabama.
I learned of lots of other business-y things too. But those are for a few other blogs.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Just a Day In The LIfe
While I was in Birmingham, Kirby, my property manager handed me my rent checks. I then handed them back to him and asked him to mail them to me. "It would be faster." I said, meaning, I would not be hitting a bank any time soon. Nor did I want to cart that amount of money around with me for a week.
Last week I called Kirby, gently reminding him that I hadn't received my rent checks. "I sent them the day we spoke." That would be March 8 for anyone keeping track. Nonetheless, I hadn't received them.
We agreed if I didn't have them by Monday (yesterday), he would re-issue them. Which would be mighty convenient, as I want to use the money to pay for silly little things like, say, the mortgages.
Monday (yesterday), Kirby shot me an e-mail wanting to know if I moved. You see, the checks were returned to him with a lovely stamp from the Post Office saying, "No one with this name at this address, y'all." Nope. have been at the same place for several years, I told him.
I have no idea what the Post Office was thinking. But then again, does anyone fully comprehend the Post Office's methods?
Kirby has cheerfully re-sent the checks. Generally it takes two or three days for them to arrive from Birmingham to my mailbox. Hopefully the Post Office will graciously allow for them to be delivered this time. Because I am not sure I can explain to the bank or Mr. Partner the check is really in the mail.
Last week I called Kirby, gently reminding him that I hadn't received my rent checks. "I sent them the day we spoke." That would be March 8 for anyone keeping track. Nonetheless, I hadn't received them.
We agreed if I didn't have them by Monday (yesterday), he would re-issue them. Which would be mighty convenient, as I want to use the money to pay for silly little things like, say, the mortgages.
Monday (yesterday), Kirby shot me an e-mail wanting to know if I moved. You see, the checks were returned to him with a lovely stamp from the Post Office saying, "No one with this name at this address, y'all." Nope. have been at the same place for several years, I told him.
I have no idea what the Post Office was thinking. But then again, does anyone fully comprehend the Post Office's methods?
Kirby has cheerfully re-sent the checks. Generally it takes two or three days for them to arrive from Birmingham to my mailbox. Hopefully the Post Office will graciously allow for them to be delivered this time. Because I am not sure I can explain to the bank or Mr. Partner the check is really in the mail.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
The Seller
Jack and I have had our meeting of the minds. And I now have a bit more of an understanding of what is going on with him. It seems Jack is just not confident about selling the home through traditional means, meaning the MLS. He is concerned about the current Birmingham economic conditions affecting us as we put it for sale. This is spoken like a true real estate professional who is in tune with the market.
We all have heard how doctors are the worst patients and lawyers who represent themselves have fools for clients. Real estate agents are the absolute worst sellers. The sellers in us are saying, "Of course it will sell. In fact, the price is way too low." Fortunately in this case, there are two of us--Jack and me--to alternate channeling the wildly manic role of seller. Also fortunately, we are both aware we have to take turns in this role for the sake of our sanity.
The role of the seller is to be wildly optimistic, ignoring market trends, data and real life cues. On Friday, I went on record saying I will not fix anything and the (hypothetical) buyer will just have to take the house or leave it. Jack politely pointed out how unrealistic that happens to be. But, I am sticking with it as of today.
The seller will make broad sweeping generalizations for the first couple weeks, blaming anyone and everyone for the lack of showings and/or lack of contract. In this case, we can blame our tenant for not cooperating and/or keeping the home cleaner than humanly possible. Because we all know a dirty light bulb will make or break a sale.
After the first few weeks, the seller will then start picking apart the home. Maybe if we consider painting the pantry, the buyer will miraculously appear at our doorstep, ignore the price, location and home amenities. But, they will somehow stumble into the kitchen, open up the pantry door and gasp, "Look how spanking new that pantry is! Won't my canned peas go with the antique white paint?" I am guilty as charged (but my pantry looked great!).
A few weeks later, the seller will then start blaming the real estate agent. Is he (in this case "he" would be Jack) marketing the house properly? Is he advertising everywhere there is to advertise? Where is the billboard with my home plastered across it? The agent will, of course, rightly suggest that lowering the price might be in our best interest. At some point the seller will begrudgingly agree and do what should have been done in the first place.
Because Jack and I are aware of how sellers can be, we have agreed after a few weeks to put the house on the market for rent--just in case the whole seller thing doesn't work out.
We all have heard how doctors are the worst patients and lawyers who represent themselves have fools for clients. Real estate agents are the absolute worst sellers. The sellers in us are saying, "Of course it will sell. In fact, the price is way too low." Fortunately in this case, there are two of us--Jack and me--to alternate channeling the wildly manic role of seller. Also fortunately, we are both aware we have to take turns in this role for the sake of our sanity.
The role of the seller is to be wildly optimistic, ignoring market trends, data and real life cues. On Friday, I went on record saying I will not fix anything and the (hypothetical) buyer will just have to take the house or leave it. Jack politely pointed out how unrealistic that happens to be. But, I am sticking with it as of today.
The seller will make broad sweeping generalizations for the first couple weeks, blaming anyone and everyone for the lack of showings and/or lack of contract. In this case, we can blame our tenant for not cooperating and/or keeping the home cleaner than humanly possible. Because we all know a dirty light bulb will make or break a sale.
After the first few weeks, the seller will then start picking apart the home. Maybe if we consider painting the pantry, the buyer will miraculously appear at our doorstep, ignore the price, location and home amenities. But, they will somehow stumble into the kitchen, open up the pantry door and gasp, "Look how spanking new that pantry is! Won't my canned peas go with the antique white paint?" I am guilty as charged (but my pantry looked great!).
A few weeks later, the seller will then start blaming the real estate agent. Is he (in this case "he" would be Jack) marketing the house properly? Is he advertising everywhere there is to advertise? Where is the billboard with my home plastered across it? The agent will, of course, rightly suggest that lowering the price might be in our best interest. At some point the seller will begrudgingly agree and do what should have been done in the first place.
Because Jack and I are aware of how sellers can be, we have agreed after a few weeks to put the house on the market for rent--just in case the whole seller thing doesn't work out.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Jumping Jack
Our tenant agreed to let us show the home. As he put it, "we will agree to your terms." Which was mighty nice of him, given our "terms" were let a real estate agent call ahead of time and schedule a moment at his convenience to view the property. In exchange we will let him out of his lease.
However, Jack seems to be backing off on the whole sell thing. I am not sure what is going on with that. He said he is afraid we will be nickel-and-dimed by a seller about every little thing. Somehow this is way different than being nickel-and-dimed by our tenant about every little thing.
At any rate, Jack isn't feeling like we can sell it for enough or doesn't want to deal with it. Or... I don't exactly know his motivation. I am willing to do whatever it takes. As long as we do something.
My gut feel tells me Jack is just nervous about a vacant home. But doing nothing won't get the home occupied.
Later....
It occurred to me that Jack just doesn't want to disappoint us. I would like to get a bit of equity out of it, and he hasn't felt we could sell the home for much more than we paid for it. We won't loose money, but in Jack's professional estimation we aren't going to do much more than break even. Jack is all for selling. We were luke-warm on it, but the more I thought about the intrinsics--like having one less house on my plate and using the proceeds to help our under-capitalized issues--the more I was in favor.
When I thought about it, Jack's behavior strikes me as trying to find other solutions that would be mutually pleasing. Not flaking. It was just landing as flaking. Hopefully when he and I have a chance to chat in the next day or so, I will have a better picture.
However, Jack seems to be backing off on the whole sell thing. I am not sure what is going on with that. He said he is afraid we will be nickel-and-dimed by a seller about every little thing. Somehow this is way different than being nickel-and-dimed by our tenant about every little thing.
At any rate, Jack isn't feeling like we can sell it for enough or doesn't want to deal with it. Or... I don't exactly know his motivation. I am willing to do whatever it takes. As long as we do something.
My gut feel tells me Jack is just nervous about a vacant home. But doing nothing won't get the home occupied.
Later....
It occurred to me that Jack just doesn't want to disappoint us. I would like to get a bit of equity out of it, and he hasn't felt we could sell the home for much more than we paid for it. We won't loose money, but in Jack's professional estimation we aren't going to do much more than break even. Jack is all for selling. We were luke-warm on it, but the more I thought about the intrinsics--like having one less house on my plate and using the proceeds to help our under-capitalized issues--the more I was in favor.
When I thought about it, Jack's behavior strikes me as trying to find other solutions that would be mutually pleasing. Not flaking. It was just landing as flaking. Hopefully when he and I have a chance to chat in the next day or so, I will have a better picture.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Me and Jack
Many years ago, Alabama real estate guru Jack approached Marty Sunshine and I about partnering on a home. By this time we had a pretty good idea what we were looking for in a real estate partner and thus a beautiful partnership was formed.
We bought one home before mine and Marty's under-capitalized issues caught up with us. That was ok with Jack, because he realized he really didn't need us anyway and had more control and variety if he went out on his own. Which he did. He has done very well for himself and we would have been a hindrance.
Our one home has done pretty well. We bought it under market. It is still worth slightly more than we paid for it. With our first renter, we were getting a decent rent amount. Our second tenant was an acquaintance of Jack's. In a moment of what I perceived as desperation, Jack gave him an awesome break on the rent, netting us about $50 a month in mad money. My feeling is Jack was afraid we wouldn't get the home rented and/or it would sit vacant for way too long (this is Birmingham where homes don't sit vacant, but I digress). At any rate, this guy got one heck of a deal on the rent.
In the ten months he has lived there, this guy has also asked for darn near everything. There was a leaky this. A faulty that. This doesn't close right. That is the wrong color. Even though Jack had to deal with all this (because the guy just flat-out refused to call me) I was sick of him. To top it all off, our $50 a month surplus wasn't really paying for the electrician/medicine man/ghost buster that our tenant seems to need. So, these repairs came out of our pockets.
I seriously don't know what happened to the home between tenant number one and tenant number two, because tenant number one never had an issue and nothing was leaking/broken/possessed when he moved out. I suspect if this guy didn't know Jack socially, he wouldn't be bugging him every month over every little thing.
This week our tenant called Jack and said he would like out of his lease. You see, he bought a home. Even though he is in a lease, he decided it would be ok to purchase. I understand sort of. There are great deals for people who are buying right now. However, part of me figures because of his personality and because he knows Jack, he figures another favor won't hurt.
This time Jack asked me what I wanted to do. Did I want to re-rent it? Sell it? Would I be willing to give the tenant back his deposit because he asked so sweetly?
I thought about this for quite a while before I gave him an answer. If I could get market rent (which is about $150 more a month than I am getting now), I would be happy to keep it. We aren't upside down on the property, but if we sell, we aren't going to net much.
But there are other reasons to consider selling. I think the world of Jack. He is a man of honor. He is a savvy business man and I have learned a lot from him. I have as much as told him so. But this property isn't Jack's niche. He prefers townhomes and smaller homes. This one doesn't fit his formula.
Also, I can't guarantee Jack won't feel the need to give another phenomenal break on the rent to the next tenant who comes along. Though Jack doesn't say so, he isn't inclined to manage our partnership the way I have trained Mr. Partner. Jack is more involved--which makes sense given he lives near this house.
At any rate, I decided it might be best to try selling the house. The tenant isn't moving out until May 1, so there are some logistics involved. Playing the bad cop, I wrote our tenant today, explaining that if he pays April's rent and if he keeps the place clean and allows real estate agents to bring in buyers we will bribe him by giving his deposit back. Except I didn't say bribe.
If our tenant doesn't agree to allow the property to be shown, I suggested to Jack that he put a for sale sign in the yard anyway. Either way, if we don't have any bites by mid-April, I told Jack I would like to try renting it out again too. This time for a bit more mad money.
We bought one home before mine and Marty's under-capitalized issues caught up with us. That was ok with Jack, because he realized he really didn't need us anyway and had more control and variety if he went out on his own. Which he did. He has done very well for himself and we would have been a hindrance.
Our one home has done pretty well. We bought it under market. It is still worth slightly more than we paid for it. With our first renter, we were getting a decent rent amount. Our second tenant was an acquaintance of Jack's. In a moment of what I perceived as desperation, Jack gave him an awesome break on the rent, netting us about $50 a month in mad money. My feeling is Jack was afraid we wouldn't get the home rented and/or it would sit vacant for way too long (this is Birmingham where homes don't sit vacant, but I digress). At any rate, this guy got one heck of a deal on the rent.
In the ten months he has lived there, this guy has also asked for darn near everything. There was a leaky this. A faulty that. This doesn't close right. That is the wrong color. Even though Jack had to deal with all this (because the guy just flat-out refused to call me) I was sick of him. To top it all off, our $50 a month surplus wasn't really paying for the electrician/medicine man/ghost buster that our tenant seems to need. So, these repairs came out of our pockets.
I seriously don't know what happened to the home between tenant number one and tenant number two, because tenant number one never had an issue and nothing was leaking/broken/possessed when he moved out. I suspect if this guy didn't know Jack socially, he wouldn't be bugging him every month over every little thing.
This week our tenant called Jack and said he would like out of his lease. You see, he bought a home. Even though he is in a lease, he decided it would be ok to purchase. I understand sort of. There are great deals for people who are buying right now. However, part of me figures because of his personality and because he knows Jack, he figures another favor won't hurt.
This time Jack asked me what I wanted to do. Did I want to re-rent it? Sell it? Would I be willing to give the tenant back his deposit because he asked so sweetly?
I thought about this for quite a while before I gave him an answer. If I could get market rent (which is about $150 more a month than I am getting now), I would be happy to keep it. We aren't upside down on the property, but if we sell, we aren't going to net much.
But there are other reasons to consider selling. I think the world of Jack. He is a man of honor. He is a savvy business man and I have learned a lot from him. I have as much as told him so. But this property isn't Jack's niche. He prefers townhomes and smaller homes. This one doesn't fit his formula.
Also, I can't guarantee Jack won't feel the need to give another phenomenal break on the rent to the next tenant who comes along. Though Jack doesn't say so, he isn't inclined to manage our partnership the way I have trained Mr. Partner. Jack is more involved--which makes sense given he lives near this house.
At any rate, I decided it might be best to try selling the house. The tenant isn't moving out until May 1, so there are some logistics involved. Playing the bad cop, I wrote our tenant today, explaining that if he pays April's rent and if he keeps the place clean and allows real estate agents to bring in buyers we will bribe him by giving his deposit back. Except I didn't say bribe.
If our tenant doesn't agree to allow the property to be shown, I suggested to Jack that he put a for sale sign in the yard anyway. Either way, if we don't have any bites by mid-April, I told Jack I would like to try renting it out again too. This time for a bit more mad money.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
It's a Miracle!
Alabama has had record-setting rain this past week. I heard someone bandy around 5 inches in an hour, though I don't remember who told me that. The rain wrecked havoc on Artie and Candy's roof. Mr. 114 graciously drove an hour to provide an emergency fix.
But the real news is, that even with all this rain, not a drop has fallen on the cardboard Mr. 114 put down on Ms. Shirley's floor over her leaky spot last week. It is like somehow the problem just miraculously fixed itself.
But the real news is, that even with all this rain, not a drop has fallen on the cardboard Mr. 114 put down on Ms. Shirley's floor over her leaky spot last week. It is like somehow the problem just miraculously fixed itself.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Bummer
Ms. Angela called me Monday morning. Her job is going away. So is her company's Birmingham office. Ms. Angela told me she is considering taking a position in Atlanta and commuting on the weekends (leaving her older children to watch the younger one). Alabama's unemployment rate is about 12 percent. It wouldn't surprise me if she has to work in Atlanta.
She told me she has enough money coming in with her son's social security to cover the rent and she doesn't want to "loose her home." I believe she means it.
However, she is emotional right now. The realities of unemployment haven't hit. They will and then she might be singing a different tune. The house won't be as important to her as mere survival.
I would like to see this work out for Ms. Angela for several reasons. First and foremost, I like her. She is also a good tenant--and good tenants are worth keeping.
I didn't budget for another vacant home. But now that I know, I can be prepared if necessary. She may not think she is moving, but for my sake, I know that I need to act like this is the beginning of the end. I met Ms. Angela. She is a proud woman who will do right by her family. And I know that means a house will never be more important than her family's stability.
She told me she has enough money coming in with her son's social security to cover the rent and she doesn't want to "loose her home." I believe she means it.
However, she is emotional right now. The realities of unemployment haven't hit. They will and then she might be singing a different tune. The house won't be as important to her as mere survival.
I would like to see this work out for Ms. Angela for several reasons. First and foremost, I like her. She is also a good tenant--and good tenants are worth keeping.
I didn't budget for another vacant home. But now that I know, I can be prepared if necessary. She may not think she is moving, but for my sake, I know that I need to act like this is the beginning of the end. I met Ms. Angela. She is a proud woman who will do right by her family. And I know that means a house will never be more important than her family's stability.
Monday, March 15, 2010
From Floor to Ceiling
There was a little party at Artie and Candy's on Saturday. I wasn't in town for it. James, the hell's angel turned carpet guy, was there measuring for the new flooring, when the roof picked that moment to leak. Again.
I must tell you, I am starting to question my roof Karma. For a while last year, I couldn't figure out how my former tenants managed to live with a leaking roof for so long. Then someone reminded me how Alabama had been in a drought for a few years. It ended last summer, at the same time Artie and Candy moved in. Now, I am not saying Artie and Candy brought the rain with them, but it seems to be a might bit of a coincidence, don't you think?
The roof issue isn't really a big one. Mr. 114 has fixed it before. And this time I would greatly appreciate if he would fix it for good, thankyouverymuch. Or, if there is a new leak, if he could figure out a way to stop it once and for all. This isn't one of those occasions where the returning leak provides job security. I am certain Mr. 114 is smart enough and professional enough to be aware of that.
Normally phone calls on Saturday morning from the 205 area code make me crazy. But, after just returning from the South, I was aware James the hell's angel turned carpet guy would be out there some time soon. I am a bit surprised Mr. 114 needs to return. I am sure he was surprised too. Fortunately, Mr. 114 subscribes to Work Ethics Are Us and I won't have to fret too much about the roof repair.
As it stands right now, Mr. 114 must fix the roof before James can do his magic. This hopefully will be done some time this week provided the weather holds up. Then, Artie and Candy can have a real party. And perhaps they can bring on some sunshine.
I must tell you, I am starting to question my roof Karma. For a while last year, I couldn't figure out how my former tenants managed to live with a leaking roof for so long. Then someone reminded me how Alabama had been in a drought for a few years. It ended last summer, at the same time Artie and Candy moved in. Now, I am not saying Artie and Candy brought the rain with them, but it seems to be a might bit of a coincidence, don't you think?
The roof issue isn't really a big one. Mr. 114 has fixed it before. And this time I would greatly appreciate if he would fix it for good, thankyouverymuch. Or, if there is a new leak, if he could figure out a way to stop it once and for all. This isn't one of those occasions where the returning leak provides job security. I am certain Mr. 114 is smart enough and professional enough to be aware of that.
Normally phone calls on Saturday morning from the 205 area code make me crazy. But, after just returning from the South, I was aware James the hell's angel turned carpet guy would be out there some time soon. I am a bit surprised Mr. 114 needs to return. I am sure he was surprised too. Fortunately, Mr. 114 subscribes to Work Ethics Are Us and I won't have to fret too much about the roof repair.
As it stands right now, Mr. 114 must fix the roof before James can do his magic. This hopefully will be done some time this week provided the weather holds up. Then, Artie and Candy can have a real party. And perhaps they can bring on some sunshine.
Friday, March 12, 2010
I'm Back
I'm exhausted.
After four hours sitting around the Birmingham Airport because of weather issues in Florida I was able to board and fly home Thursday. While stranded, I was swapping sandwiches and information with new friends who were in the same situation. "You don't want to go to that store, they charge too much for a pack of gum... but that guy over there with the six kids, if you shared your granola bars I would be willing to bet he would give you one of his bottles of water." And so it went. I saw more people in the tiny airport terminal than I did during the week on my travels--and I saw a lot of people during the week.
It was a good trip. I have a hard time measuring my productivity this time. But, I believe it was productive. Generally when I go, I have a set agenda with concrete goals. I am going to get this notarized, this filled out, meet with this person and discuss this specific thing...
This trip was more of a public relations junket. I could say I really didn't need to go. But, I think I did. What I really wanted was to see who might be moving this summer so I could budget. I wanted to see where I was vulnerable and be able to plan accordingly. I needed to see how the homes were being treated.
I spent Sunday with Carolsue going around from tenant to tenant, making sure they didn't need anything. I pre-picked out five homes to see for Sunday and got around to four of them and added another one at the spur of th moment--but more on that later. During my visit, I asked tenants about air filters and any repairs needed. If the neighbors were treating them well, etc.
Artie and Candy are still together. I thought they might be leaving this summer. Now I don't think so. I am not convinced Mrs. Spring will ever move. Nor Ms. Angie.
Actually, I am convinced Ms. Angie will never move. She has called me for the past four years asking if I had a place to rent. Years ago, she heard about me from at least two of my tenants (whom I didn't know knew each other) and has been calling ever since. She is a proud woman, who is excited to be able to do right by her family. This summer she is hosting her daughter's wedding reception at "her" home. She can now do that because there is a back yard. There are also enough bedrooms for her and her children. Before this, the five of them were were living in a 2 bedroom townhouse for about the same amount of money she pays me.
In one of my most humiliating and incompetent moments, I accidentally stopped in on Ms. Kathy. She wasn't on my meet-and-greet list for this trip. I drove by but forgot she lives in a neighborhood where all roads lead past her home. And, she is kind of on a dead-end street. After driving around and trying to get back to the main road, the neighbors and Ms. Kathy all came out of their homes, rightly suspicious. I really think this was a good sign about the neighborhood--a community that bands together when something unusual happens. Except in this case, they were banding together to out me--the crazy lost driver.
It wouldn't have been such a big deal and I could have just driven away, explaining to the random neighbor I was lost, if Carolsue hadn't been with me. I knew Ms. Kathy would recognize her, so I didn't even pretend. Instead, we stopped and said hello. I felt like a clown. No, a stalker. Seriously, is there any way to lessen credibility as a no-nonsense landlord than to scare one's tenant because a suspicious car keeps obviously driving by?
Monday I stopped in on Ms. Shirley. I also managed to wrangle Mr. 114 into a few jobs for me. He really is one of the nicest people I have met along this wild Alabama journey. He is honest, affordable and does great work.
On my way back from Ms. Shirley's I went by to meet Kirby, my real property manager who handles two of my homes in the Southern end of the Birmingham metro area. He took me to lunch and we discussed landlordy-type things and swapped tenant stories. Incidentally, Kirby thinks Ms. Shirley wants a kick-back from the roofing company.
After a quick car swap (my car rental wasn't acting right), I went by to see Mrs. Sherwood. I adore her. Even if she wanted an oven, I would feel the same way. If she weren't a tenant, I would look for her on Facebook. Except she has a pit bull. That is kind of a problem. We discussed the pit bull and some solutions with me explaining there is a clause in her lease and about my home owner's insurance. The pit has to go.
Jack and Mrs. Jack took me to dinner Monday night.
Tuesday I met with various parities who are working on a criminal investigation my former tenant may or may not be involved in. There is probably a movie-of-the-week plot in here somewhere. The outcome of talking with the lawyers and investigators is that I agreed to testify if it goes to trial next month. When it is over, details will come. Frankly, I wish it were over right now.
Tuesday night Carolsue fixed me dinner. Home cooked food.
Wednesday I met with Legal Eagle to go over the miscellaneous items I had waiting for her. Then we discussed child rearing, theology and all sorts of other girl-friend things that hopefully she won't bill me for.
Wednesday afternoon I went off the clock. I went up to Hoke's Bluff Alabama, which is a suburb of the thriving metropolis of Gadsden. This is like saying Hooterville is a thriving metropolis of Mayberry. But work with me. I met a friend up there. I stayed in a farmhouse built in the 1870s that had wild daffodils growing outside. There were no talks about rental homes or criminal investigations. Just two good friends laughing and listening to music.
Now I am home. I am satisfied I need to plan for one vacant home, possibly two, this summer. Though this trip was intrinsic, it was necessary. It gave me peace.
After four hours sitting around the Birmingham Airport because of weather issues in Florida I was able to board and fly home Thursday. While stranded, I was swapping sandwiches and information with new friends who were in the same situation. "You don't want to go to that store, they charge too much for a pack of gum... but that guy over there with the six kids, if you shared your granola bars I would be willing to bet he would give you one of his bottles of water." And so it went. I saw more people in the tiny airport terminal than I did during the week on my travels--and I saw a lot of people during the week.
It was a good trip. I have a hard time measuring my productivity this time. But, I believe it was productive. Generally when I go, I have a set agenda with concrete goals. I am going to get this notarized, this filled out, meet with this person and discuss this specific thing...
This trip was more of a public relations junket. I could say I really didn't need to go. But, I think I did. What I really wanted was to see who might be moving this summer so I could budget. I wanted to see where I was vulnerable and be able to plan accordingly. I needed to see how the homes were being treated.
I spent Sunday with Carolsue going around from tenant to tenant, making sure they didn't need anything. I pre-picked out five homes to see for Sunday and got around to four of them and added another one at the spur of th moment--but more on that later. During my visit, I asked tenants about air filters and any repairs needed. If the neighbors were treating them well, etc.
Artie and Candy are still together. I thought they might be leaving this summer. Now I don't think so. I am not convinced Mrs. Spring will ever move. Nor Ms. Angie.
Actually, I am convinced Ms. Angie will never move. She has called me for the past four years asking if I had a place to rent. Years ago, she heard about me from at least two of my tenants (whom I didn't know knew each other) and has been calling ever since. She is a proud woman, who is excited to be able to do right by her family. This summer she is hosting her daughter's wedding reception at "her" home. She can now do that because there is a back yard. There are also enough bedrooms for her and her children. Before this, the five of them were were living in a 2 bedroom townhouse for about the same amount of money she pays me.
In one of my most humiliating and incompetent moments, I accidentally stopped in on Ms. Kathy. She wasn't on my meet-and-greet list for this trip. I drove by but forgot she lives in a neighborhood where all roads lead past her home. And, she is kind of on a dead-end street. After driving around and trying to get back to the main road, the neighbors and Ms. Kathy all came out of their homes, rightly suspicious. I really think this was a good sign about the neighborhood--a community that bands together when something unusual happens. Except in this case, they were banding together to out me--the crazy lost driver.
It wouldn't have been such a big deal and I could have just driven away, explaining to the random neighbor I was lost, if Carolsue hadn't been with me. I knew Ms. Kathy would recognize her, so I didn't even pretend. Instead, we stopped and said hello. I felt like a clown. No, a stalker. Seriously, is there any way to lessen credibility as a no-nonsense landlord than to scare one's tenant because a suspicious car keeps obviously driving by?
Monday I stopped in on Ms. Shirley. I also managed to wrangle Mr. 114 into a few jobs for me. He really is one of the nicest people I have met along this wild Alabama journey. He is honest, affordable and does great work.
On my way back from Ms. Shirley's I went by to meet Kirby, my real property manager who handles two of my homes in the Southern end of the Birmingham metro area. He took me to lunch and we discussed landlordy-type things and swapped tenant stories. Incidentally, Kirby thinks Ms. Shirley wants a kick-back from the roofing company.
After a quick car swap (my car rental wasn't acting right), I went by to see Mrs. Sherwood. I adore her. Even if she wanted an oven, I would feel the same way. If she weren't a tenant, I would look for her on Facebook. Except she has a pit bull. That is kind of a problem. We discussed the pit bull and some solutions with me explaining there is a clause in her lease and about my home owner's insurance. The pit has to go.
Jack and Mrs. Jack took me to dinner Monday night.
Tuesday I met with various parities who are working on a criminal investigation my former tenant may or may not be involved in. There is probably a movie-of-the-week plot in here somewhere. The outcome of talking with the lawyers and investigators is that I agreed to testify if it goes to trial next month. When it is over, details will come. Frankly, I wish it were over right now.
Tuesday night Carolsue fixed me dinner. Home cooked food.
Wednesday I met with Legal Eagle to go over the miscellaneous items I had waiting for her. Then we discussed child rearing, theology and all sorts of other girl-friend things that hopefully she won't bill me for.
Wednesday afternoon I went off the clock. I went up to Hoke's Bluff Alabama, which is a suburb of the thriving metropolis of Gadsden. This is like saying Hooterville is a thriving metropolis of Mayberry. But work with me. I met a friend up there. I stayed in a farmhouse built in the 1870s that had wild daffodils growing outside. There were no talks about rental homes or criminal investigations. Just two good friends laughing and listening to music.
Now I am home. I am satisfied I need to plan for one vacant home, possibly two, this summer. Though this trip was intrinsic, it was necessary. It gave me peace.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
All News is News
Ok. I understand bad news happens. I am good with that. It happens to all of us, even those who aren't landlords or don't want to be landlords.
What I don't understand is when reasonable people genuinely lack accountability. It is as if these tenants think I am going to march right over to their home and do something about the frustration stemming from their bad news (even the ones who lived less than a five miles away). Or worse, they don't want to tell me about the space aliens living in the basement for fear I will be upset. Yea. Probably. But then again, wouldn't anyone be.
Recently, my daughter didn't want to tell me about the black magic marker that is now permanently in my beige carpet. So, she hid it under some couch cushions (in the middle of the living room floor). When I picked up the couch cushions, I had a surprise. When I asked her why she hid the mess, she said, "I didn't want you to be mad."
I explained to her "mad" was a reasonable assumption under the circumstances. "Mad" doesn't always have consequences. But, now the emotion factor had escalated because she purposely decieved me. Sometimes I fell like some of my tenants are 9 year old girls playing with magic markers.
Anyway, in the interest of full disclosure, I have nothing to write about. So, I am calling it in. Here is my list of the baddies I don't want to hear--but will listen to. And, just in case some other tenant finds my blog via Twitter, please understand, don't expect no reaction to any of these.
1. Crickets. If you have news, tell me. Don't wait. Unlike wine and cheese, news does not age well with time.
2. "I just got back from vacation and I can't afford the rent."
3. "I can't pay you because all my other bills are due at the same time." Honest to goodness, someone said that to me.
4. "I didn't want to bother you, so I thought I would take care of it myself." (but then called you at 6:30 in the morning anyway, to tell you the upstairs extension I was in the process of adding collapsed on me.).
5. "I know my rights." Every tenant who has thrown this at me, did not know their rights. I am amazed at how many people who are in the wrong bandy this one around.
6. "I got a roommate." Um. Read your lease. No you didn't.
7. "Ms. Landlord, this is Mrs. Nosey, living next door to your rental in Birmingham. I wanted to tell you that..."
8. "What am I supposed to do?" I have to say, I am numb to this. If you have lived long enough so that your parents are no longer responsible for your general maintenance and upkeep, don't expect me to have an answer either.
What I don't understand is when reasonable people genuinely lack accountability. It is as if these tenants think I am going to march right over to their home and do something about the frustration stemming from their bad news (even the ones who lived less than a five miles away). Or worse, they don't want to tell me about the space aliens living in the basement for fear I will be upset. Yea. Probably. But then again, wouldn't anyone be.
Recently, my daughter didn't want to tell me about the black magic marker that is now permanently in my beige carpet. So, she hid it under some couch cushions (in the middle of the living room floor). When I picked up the couch cushions, I had a surprise. When I asked her why she hid the mess, she said, "I didn't want you to be mad."
I explained to her "mad" was a reasonable assumption under the circumstances. "Mad" doesn't always have consequences. But, now the emotion factor had escalated because she purposely decieved me. Sometimes I fell like some of my tenants are 9 year old girls playing with magic markers.
Anyway, in the interest of full disclosure, I have nothing to write about. So, I am calling it in. Here is my list of the baddies I don't want to hear--but will listen to. And, just in case some other tenant finds my blog via Twitter, please understand, don't expect no reaction to any of these.
1. Crickets. If you have news, tell me. Don't wait. Unlike wine and cheese, news does not age well with time.
2. "I just got back from vacation and I can't afford the rent."
3. "I can't pay you because all my other bills are due at the same time." Honest to goodness, someone said that to me.
4. "I didn't want to bother you, so I thought I would take care of it myself." (but then called you at 6:30 in the morning anyway, to tell you the upstairs extension I was in the process of adding collapsed on me.).
5. "I know my rights." Every tenant who has thrown this at me, did not know their rights. I am amazed at how many people who are in the wrong bandy this one around.
6. "I got a roommate." Um. Read your lease. No you didn't.
7. "Ms. Landlord, this is Mrs. Nosey, living next door to your rental in Birmingham. I wanted to tell you that..."
8. "What am I supposed to do?" I have to say, I am numb to this. If you have lived long enough so that your parents are no longer responsible for your general maintenance and upkeep, don't expect me to have an answer either.
My BS Meter is Spinning Out of Control
Ms. Shirley's roof.
Ms. Shirley's roof leak.
A quick back story: Ms. Shirley says she has a roof leak. She wants me to re-roof the entire home and, without talking to me first, called a roofer to take care of this.
Ms. Shirley is adamant there is a leak. Mr. 114 doesn't think so. My gut tells me the whole thing is bunk. But, since I was already in the state, I figured it might be worth swinging on by and checking it out myself.
Because this never sounded right, I thought I would just add a bit of extra assurance to my visit. So, I had prearranged with Mr. 114 prior to all this. He was casually hanging out in his yard when I arrived. And I casually saw him and said hello, making sure Ms. Shirley (if she was peeking out her window--which I am sure she was) saw us say hello. And, then I just casually invited him to join me in reviewing Ms. Shirley's roofing issue.
I know a thing or two about leaky roofs--mainly there has to be some sort of point of entry, say like a hole. Water must be able to penetrate through that point of entry, using the forces of gravity and land in a place that will correspond with the hole above. If there are no other outside forces, like say, a gust of wind, the water spot should be underneath the point of entry in question.
How's that for scientific?
To be honest, I figured once I saw the place in question, the jury would be out on this. After all, it hadn't rained in 10 days. How much of a water spot could there be? What I did find when I arrived was a damp plywood floor. The stumper was that there wasn't any corresponding ceiling spot to go with the floor spot.
Mr. 114 got a step stool and felt around on the ceiling. There was no wet spot. There was no discoloration. The way the water would happen to fall did not correspond to where the water happened to land. It just doesn't make sense.
Underneath the flooring of this room is the garage. Mr. 114 even went so far as to go into the garage and check out that ceiling too. That is clean as well. It doesn't look like there are any pipes running through that part of the ceiling. There might be, but it would be kind of a strange route through the house.
While Mr. 114 was looking into the mystery leak, Ms. Shirley and I were sitting around getting to know each other. Apparently she was expecting someone thinner, younger, blond and someone who wore bright red lipstick and stiletto heals. She sweetly told me so.
While we were chatting, she asked me how much I would sell the house for. When I gave her my number, she informed me the home across the street was selling for much less. Nice to know, but that didn't change my number.
She then brought up the roof issue again, assuring me she knew this company who would be happy to fix my roof for free. All I had to do was let the insurance company pay for it. I explained to Ms. Shirley it wasn't free. There are deductibles and insurance premiums. And that "not costing anything" really didn't mean not costing anything right now. If my insurance costs go up, I would have to raise Ms. Shirley's rent.
She persisted about the roof a bit longer, assuring me this company was great. "Well, they can give you a free quote, you know." Ms. Shirley said by way of endorsement.
As I explained to her that only Mr. 114 would be touching my roof, her body language dramatically transformed. I saw it happen and realized it changed, but didn't recognize why at the time. Instantly the energy in the room changed. In any case, I took that moment to say my parting niceties and skedaddle.
After I finished with Ms. Shirley, I popped next door to see Mr. 114. I wanted to discuss a few things with him, including jobs at Mr. Green's home and Artie's home. But before that, I asked the million dollar question: "Why is the floor wet more than a week after the last rain?" I asked. He was thinking the same thing.
Mr. 114 and I spent a few moments trying to figure out exactly what Ms. Shirley is up to. Does she get a kick-back from the roofing company? Is she trying to talk me down on the purchase price of the home? Does she want to scream "toxic mold" so she can sue me? It doesn't add up. I will be the first to tell you I was wrong if there is a roof leak. I swear I will. I am just not convinced.
Maybe I would have been a bit more convinced this was legitimate if, as I was leaving Mr. 114's home, Ms. Shirley didn't jot back out and head me off at my car. She asked me back in to look at a few other things that were wrong with the house.
Going back in, Ms. Shirley dragged me to the greatroom where she asked how to fix the ceiling fan. Looking up I said, "I think it needs a seventy-nine cent chain." Then she asked about the chandelier in the dining area. "I believe a different light bulb might fix this." Are you sure? She asked both times.
Yes, I am sure. I am definitely sure something else is going on too.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Tuesday in Pictures
Oh the irony...
And look what is behind the "Keep Leeds Beautiful" sign!
And, I am almost arrested for the second time in three days. (Carolsue was behind the first adventure. That's all I have to say about that...) In case there is any question, the folks at the cement plant really do mean this. I am not sure I had the nerve to call Legal Eagle and tell her I was in jail in Leeds for taking a picture of a sign.
What's behind door number 2?
Oh the irony part 2
In the event any of you think I make this stuff up. That is a University of Alabama football helmet mailbox under the United States and Confederate Flags.
Ode to Marty Sunshine
Don't see this in the highway department's catalogue of signs very often.
There are lots of homes just like this one. I thought it looked pretty.
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
Monday in Pictures
My inner introvert is screaming in agony. I so need some down time. I saw Ms. Shirley's roof leak today. More on that when I am not ready to collapse from over-stimulation.
Mr. 114's immaculate yard. Note the dead grass is edged. (Yes, I know it says 112 on the mail box--but his name his name happens to be Mr. 114 anyway.)
To get to King James Circle, one must take Royalty Drive to King James Drive to King James Court to King James Circle. I am guessing the pizza delivery boys get paid well.
A pretty view of a quiet street. This street is all brick homes in one of those everyone-knows-your-name type of neighborhoods.
Mrs. Sherwood's 47 year old kitchen carpet.
Mrs. Sherwood's 47 year old stove with a non-working oven.
My second rental car. Sadly, the auto rental place was all out of vehicles painted with flames yet again. The car had two miles on the odometer when I got it this afternoon.
Mr. 114's immaculate yard. Note the dead grass is edged. (Yes, I know it says 112 on the mail box--but his name his name happens to be Mr. 114 anyway.)
To get to King James Circle, one must take Royalty Drive to King James Drive to King James Court to King James Circle. I am guessing the pizza delivery boys get paid well.
A pretty view of a quiet street. This street is all brick homes in one of those everyone-knows-your-name type of neighborhoods.
Mrs. Sherwood's 47 year old kitchen carpet.
Mrs. Sherwood's 47 year old stove with a non-working oven.
My second rental car. Sadly, the auto rental place was all out of vehicles painted with flames yet again. The car had two miles on the odometer when I got it this afternoon.
Monday, March 08, 2010
Random Bama
During my trip:
I saw or spoke to:
Carolsue (of course!)
James, the Hell's Angel Turned Carpet Guy
Mr. 114
Jack and Mrs. Jack
Kirby (who ended up inviting me to lunch)
Legal Eagle
7 sets of tenants
3 former tenants
2 Lawyer-types (one being Legal Eagle)
2 Private Investigators
People in Birmingham think they have bad traffic. They wish.
I ate too much barbecue
I got one wedding invitation, one graduation party invitation and one baptism invitation.
I drove two rental cars (neither had flames painted on them).
I now know two new places to buy used appliances in Birmingham.
I enjoyed this trip. I had more free time, but I didn't do any writing. More like looking and learning. I got to see a lot more.
I saw or spoke to:
Carolsue (of course!)
James, the Hell's Angel Turned Carpet Guy
Mr. 114
Jack and Mrs. Jack
Kirby (who ended up inviting me to lunch)
Legal Eagle
7 sets of tenants
3 former tenants
2 Lawyer-types (one being Legal Eagle)
2 Private Investigators
People in Birmingham think they have bad traffic. They wish.
I ate too much barbecue
I got one wedding invitation, one graduation party invitation and one baptism invitation.
I drove two rental cars (neither had flames painted on them).
I now know two new places to buy used appliances in Birmingham.
I enjoyed this trip. I had more free time, but I didn't do any writing. More like looking and learning. I got to see a lot more.
Sunday, March 07, 2010
Sunday in Pictures
The Infant of Prague Catholic Church, Trussville Alabama
Full Moon Barbecue
Signs of Spring
One of the French drains Mr. 114 put in at Artie and Candy's home.
Cool!
The neighbors on one side of my Leeds home.
The leader of the Redneck Mafia house on the other side of my Leeds home. (My Leeds home actually one of the nicest houses on this street).
Just too cute.
Ms. Kathy's backyard
Passing the Moody police station.
Ms. Angela added the Malibu lights to "her" home. I have never met a tenant so grateful as I did today. Ever. (I have been invited to her daughter's wedding this summer too.)
Roll Tide! (also in Ms. Angela's front yard).
Buckaroo wanted me to get a car with red flames painted on it. The car rental place just happened to be out when I picked up my car.
This pun's for you.
Saving Face
Well drat. Mrs. Sherwood had to go and act all naively friendly on me. Sigh... Now I am stuck.
After all the breaks Mrs. Sherwood was given, the rent check was late last month. Very late.
When I had enough of sitting by the post office box, waiting for a check to miraculously poof into my hands, I called her. She sweetly told me she had put the check in the mail that day. She also told me her husband got laid off from his new county job a week after he was hired. I believe it. Jefferson County, Alabama is having some issues right now.
When we got back around to the topic of her rent, I said, "I was a bit worried..." and then bit off the rest of what was about to come out. Mrs. Sherwood responded by chuckling and saying in an ultra-nice, reassuring way, "You don't need to worry about me. I don't have the money to move anyway."
Of course, the end of my sentence was, "I was a bit worried that I would have to evict you." Apparently, Mrs. Sherwood was under the mistaken impression she could expect some sort of special dispensation for missing rent. Or, maybe she didn't want to hear what might come next. Either way, I wasn't amused.
I never brought up eviction. Instead, I threw this bombshell at her: "I am going to be in town and I want to come by." I wasn't planning on coming by until Mrs. Sherwood suggested there is a misunderstanding about my good nature. But what the heck! She lives half-way between my hotel and Carolsue's home. I can swing on over and take a peek. Hopefully this won't backfire and I won't be peppered with repairs.
Mrs. Sherwood quickly changed her tune and gave me her best Jackie Gleason: "hamana, hamana, hamana." She then asked if I have come to Birmingham since she had been living in my home. I said yes, somewhat often (if "often" looks like every six to eight months). And, I always drive by (which is true).
I don't think she wanted to hear that either.
Today, Mrs. Sherwood is first on my list of meet-and-greet. She is the only home I am going to where I don't really have a reason to go. I am really sorry I did this. I left my bad-ass-landlord face back in Mesa. I have to settle with my, "Wow, nice to meet you. Don't tell me anything is wrong with the home," face. And while we are at it, I need to find my, "I am not (too much of) a pushover and I expect you to pay the rent on time" face.
After all the breaks Mrs. Sherwood was given, the rent check was late last month. Very late.
When I had enough of sitting by the post office box, waiting for a check to miraculously poof into my hands, I called her. She sweetly told me she had put the check in the mail that day. She also told me her husband got laid off from his new county job a week after he was hired. I believe it. Jefferson County, Alabama is having some issues right now.
When we got back around to the topic of her rent, I said, "I was a bit worried..." and then bit off the rest of what was about to come out. Mrs. Sherwood responded by chuckling and saying in an ultra-nice, reassuring way, "You don't need to worry about me. I don't have the money to move anyway."
Of course, the end of my sentence was, "I was a bit worried that I would have to evict you." Apparently, Mrs. Sherwood was under the mistaken impression she could expect some sort of special dispensation for missing rent. Or, maybe she didn't want to hear what might come next. Either way, I wasn't amused.
I never brought up eviction. Instead, I threw this bombshell at her: "I am going to be in town and I want to come by." I wasn't planning on coming by until Mrs. Sherwood suggested there is a misunderstanding about my good nature. But what the heck! She lives half-way between my hotel and Carolsue's home. I can swing on over and take a peek. Hopefully this won't backfire and I won't be peppered with repairs.
Mrs. Sherwood quickly changed her tune and gave me her best Jackie Gleason: "hamana, hamana, hamana." She then asked if I have come to Birmingham since she had been living in my home. I said yes, somewhat often (if "often" looks like every six to eight months). And, I always drive by (which is true).
I don't think she wanted to hear that either.
Today, Mrs. Sherwood is first on my list of meet-and-greet. She is the only home I am going to where I don't really have a reason to go. I am really sorry I did this. I left my bad-ass-landlord face back in Mesa. I have to settle with my, "Wow, nice to meet you. Don't tell me anything is wrong with the home," face. And while we are at it, I need to find my, "I am not (too much of) a pushover and I expect you to pay the rent on time" face.
Saturday, March 06, 2010
Gratitude
As a mental exercise, every morning before getting out of bed, I say a quick prayer and list off what I am grateful for. I have been doing this for quite a while. It really helps put things in perspective.
Today's list:
I am grateful for Kirby and his property management services. Kirby is handling two of my homes. Only two. But, I find just having two homes off my shoulders to be a huge release.
I am grateful for Carolsue helping me out. She provides legal advice, some footwork and a road map to the Southern culture.
I am grateful to Bliz for her illustrious bookkeeping skills and all of her Bliz-dom she has been giving me since high school. I am grateful that she tolerates me too.
I am grateful for my business partners. Even the ones I don't see eye to eye with.
I am grateful for opportunities. A vacant home is an opportunity to provide a serivce to someone who needs a place to live. It is an opportunity to have our asset taken care of. Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes. I have opportunities to meet interesting people I would never have had the honor of knowing.
Later today, I leave for Alabama. I am grateful for Marty taking care of all things domestic while I am gone. I am confident the kids will be fed (even if it is chocolate cake for breakfast) and bathed at least once. I am grateful I probably won't hear about how Buckaroo and Polly rode their scooters through the house until two weeks after I get back. And, when I return, I will be grateful to be home.
Today's list:
I am grateful for Kirby and his property management services. Kirby is handling two of my homes. Only two. But, I find just having two homes off my shoulders to be a huge release.
I am grateful for Carolsue helping me out. She provides legal advice, some footwork and a road map to the Southern culture.
I am grateful to Bliz for her illustrious bookkeeping skills and all of her Bliz-dom she has been giving me since high school. I am grateful that she tolerates me too.
I am grateful for my business partners. Even the ones I don't see eye to eye with.
I am grateful for opportunities. A vacant home is an opportunity to provide a serivce to someone who needs a place to live. It is an opportunity to have our asset taken care of. Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes. I have opportunities to meet interesting people I would never have had the honor of knowing.
Later today, I leave for Alabama. I am grateful for Marty taking care of all things domestic while I am gone. I am confident the kids will be fed (even if it is chocolate cake for breakfast) and bathed at least once. I am grateful I probably won't hear about how Buckaroo and Polly rode their scooters through the house until two weeks after I get back. And, when I return, I will be grateful to be home.
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Apparently It is Carpet With A Clever Disguise
Artie has been telling me for a few months about the flood that damaged his carpet. I believe it happened. I believe the carpet needs to be replaced. However, I have been waiting for proof. You know, mildewed carpet, water damaged walls... that kind of thing.
When I have asked in the past, I have been given conflicted reports of damage. I am hearing everything from "minor carpet damage" to "I had to gather the animals two by two because of the amount of water that came through my basement." For months now, I have been promised pictures of the offending damage.
My take is, this wasn't that bad. After all, if the carpet damage was horrendous, then they would have been screaming louder and longer. As it is, Artie mentions it once every six weeks when he asks (again) for my e-mail address to send me pictures.
When I called to tell him I was coming to town to inspect the damaged carpet myself, he decided to finally send the pictures over. Here is what I got:
When I have asked in the past, I have been given conflicted reports of damage. I am hearing everything from "minor carpet damage" to "I had to gather the animals two by two because of the amount of water that came through my basement." For months now, I have been promised pictures of the offending damage.
My take is, this wasn't that bad. After all, if the carpet damage was horrendous, then they would have been screaming louder and longer. As it is, Artie mentions it once every six weeks when he asks (again) for my e-mail address to send me pictures.
When I called to tell him I was coming to town to inspect the damaged carpet myself, he decided to finally send the pictures over. Here is what I got:
Monday, March 01, 2010
Please Don't Put Out The Guest Towels
I am planning my trip to Birmingham and started e-mailing tenants, telling them I want to stop by. It seems nothing exudes mass panic like sending out a note to tenants saying, "I am in town. I would like to inspect your home."
Now, if I call you and say I would like to stop by, you may say it isn't a good time. Perhaps we will reschedule. However, if we have a contract allowing you to live in my home, and I give you a significant amount of notice (you really are only required to have a 2 day notice), it isn't a social request. It isn't optional. Artie sounded like he had a sudden bladder control problem when I called him. I have no idea how Ms. Shirley plans on getting her boyfriend to move out before I show up.
I even shot Mrs. Spring a note telling her I was stopping by. I hate to give up the tough landlord image Carolsue has deftly painted. It is fun for my ego to be thought of as tough as nails. That will come to a fiery end once we meet. I just can't channel bad-ass in person.
I am not dropping in on all of them. Just three or four. I would love to meet Ms. Kathy, but I will drive by and then decide how I want to handle this. I can always call her once I am in town. Truly, I think it is better if she doesn't know who I am. The mysterious and elusive landlord works better in her case.
It must be interesting to get an e-mail or call from your landlord under these circumstances. My expectations are not real high. I don't need to be impressed. After all, I have already approved these folks. The time for impressing is (hopefully) over. I would think any flagrant lease violations will be taken care of by the time I get there. Except Ms. Shirley's boyfriend. I have no idea how she is going to hide that one. Between you and me, I don't really care if she has a boyfriend living there if she pays the rent on time and the house is in half as good shape as Mr. 114 suggests. If I ever want to get rid of her, I will care about the boyfriend then.
The introvert in me really doesn't want to do this. Mr. Partner thinks this is a good idea. I think it is marginally necessary. I want to see where repairs were made, or need to be made. I want to make sure there aren't any major home issues. I personally find going through someone else's living space intrusive. I can't imagine how annoying it must be for them.
Now, if I call you and say I would like to stop by, you may say it isn't a good time. Perhaps we will reschedule. However, if we have a contract allowing you to live in my home, and I give you a significant amount of notice (you really are only required to have a 2 day notice), it isn't a social request. It isn't optional. Artie sounded like he had a sudden bladder control problem when I called him. I have no idea how Ms. Shirley plans on getting her boyfriend to move out before I show up.
I even shot Mrs. Spring a note telling her I was stopping by. I hate to give up the tough landlord image Carolsue has deftly painted. It is fun for my ego to be thought of as tough as nails. That will come to a fiery end once we meet. I just can't channel bad-ass in person.
I am not dropping in on all of them. Just three or four. I would love to meet Ms. Kathy, but I will drive by and then decide how I want to handle this. I can always call her once I am in town. Truly, I think it is better if she doesn't know who I am. The mysterious and elusive landlord works better in her case.
It must be interesting to get an e-mail or call from your landlord under these circumstances. My expectations are not real high. I don't need to be impressed. After all, I have already approved these folks. The time for impressing is (hopefully) over. I would think any flagrant lease violations will be taken care of by the time I get there. Except Ms. Shirley's boyfriend. I have no idea how she is going to hide that one. Between you and me, I don't really care if she has a boyfriend living there if she pays the rent on time and the house is in half as good shape as Mr. 114 suggests. If I ever want to get rid of her, I will care about the boyfriend then.
The introvert in me really doesn't want to do this. Mr. Partner thinks this is a good idea. I think it is marginally necessary. I want to see where repairs were made, or need to be made. I want to make sure there aren't any major home issues. I personally find going through someone else's living space intrusive. I can't imagine how annoying it must be for them.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
The Truth
With the exception of maybe homeschooling, I can't think of many other opportunites in my life where I have been given unsolicited editorials by well-meaning people who know nothing about me or what I do.
When I wrote about Facebook Debbie's behavior, I realized how angry I am at those who judge us for owning rental properties. Facebook Debbie doesn't know I own investment homes. But there are those close to Marty and I who do. There are some in our closest circle who judge us harshly. Family has called us greedy business owners. I have been told I am out to exploit others for our own betterment. We have been classified as slumlords, hurting our fellow man, stepping on them on our way to the top.
Just so we are clear, most of the people I know don't care one way or another what I do. I am good with that. Nor am I talking about those folks I run into who just want to know what brought me into this line of work. They may be curious what it is like. Sometimes they ask questions. Sometimes they don't. But there is a healthy respect between me and them. It isn't their thing. I get that.
But there are also those who condemn us landlords for wanting to better our family and our lives. Some of them are family. Some are friends. Some are strangers. One time there was a member of Marty's family who needed medical attention insurance would not cover. We were approached by other family members to help them cover the costs. We came up with our share. However, when it was time for other family member's to step up, Marty's sibling told him, "You don't see me buying rental homes. You can pay for it (the medical treatment)."
I had a friend once who flat-out told me she resented that I bought rental homes. She couldn't understand why I would exploit someone that way. "What way?" I asked. Because I really didn't understand. I know people who rent for a variety of reasons. How is it exploiting? One has to pay to live somewhere. I believe in the free market. If I have a home that someone wants at a rental price someone wants to pay, that isn't exploiting. I am sad to say this friend and I ended up parting ways. I felt condemned. She felt misunderstood.
At one time I used to defend my choices. I would vainly explain to the Facebook Debbies of the world that the landlord isn't evil because he wants what he is contractually owed. He may have character and ethical flaws that warrant that label. But, the very action of owning an investment property doesn't make him sleazy. But the sound of my voice never reached their ears.
Here are some truths (in no particular order) about me, the greedy landlord:
When I wrote about Facebook Debbie's behavior, I realized how angry I am at those who judge us for owning rental properties. Facebook Debbie doesn't know I own investment homes. But there are those close to Marty and I who do. There are some in our closest circle who judge us harshly. Family has called us greedy business owners. I have been told I am out to exploit others for our own betterment. We have been classified as slumlords, hurting our fellow man, stepping on them on our way to the top.
Just so we are clear, most of the people I know don't care one way or another what I do. I am good with that. Nor am I talking about those folks I run into who just want to know what brought me into this line of work. They may be curious what it is like. Sometimes they ask questions. Sometimes they don't. But there is a healthy respect between me and them. It isn't their thing. I get that.
But there are also those who condemn us landlords for wanting to better our family and our lives. Some of them are family. Some are friends. Some are strangers. One time there was a member of Marty's family who needed medical attention insurance would not cover. We were approached by other family members to help them cover the costs. We came up with our share. However, when it was time for other family member's to step up, Marty's sibling told him, "You don't see me buying rental homes. You can pay for it (the medical treatment)."
I had a friend once who flat-out told me she resented that I bought rental homes. She couldn't understand why I would exploit someone that way. "What way?" I asked. Because I really didn't understand. I know people who rent for a variety of reasons. How is it exploiting? One has to pay to live somewhere. I believe in the free market. If I have a home that someone wants at a rental price someone wants to pay, that isn't exploiting. I am sad to say this friend and I ended up parting ways. I felt condemned. She felt misunderstood.
At one time I used to defend my choices. I would vainly explain to the Facebook Debbies of the world that the landlord isn't evil because he wants what he is contractually owed. He may have character and ethical flaws that warrant that label. But, the very action of owning an investment property doesn't make him sleazy. But the sound of my voice never reached their ears.
Here are some truths (in no particular order) about me, the greedy landlord:
- I believe my job is one of service. I live this in how I behave--not just with my Alabama business, but with everything I do. I don't righteously proclaim it, I live it. And, I invite anyone to to publicly call me on this if they don't agree.
- I serve my tenants. They are given a quality home. I expect something in return. Integrity and loyalty. I generally get it.
- We expected to sell our homes within five years of purchasing. The economy turned. It didn't happen. We don't blame anyone for our choices. We are solely responsible. We are solely accountable.
- We had no control over the economy. This affected everyone, partners and tenants alike. I am proud to say we paid all our bills when economic times were at their worst. We may have had nothing left over, but I would rather have nothing than go into foreclosure.
- Last summer Marty Sunshine had to dip into his 401k to cover our bills. I am thankful we had the money there. That covered a home that was vacant for five months, someone who declared bankruptcy and didn't leave my home, three new air conditioners we weren't planning on replacing and a multitude of other repairs.
- I went to the bank Wednesday and asked for our current balance. I wanted to make sure we had the money to cover the mortgages. We did. I was relieved. I have three more rent payments coming in, so we even have some money left over this month.
- There have been times Bliz and I have discussed which bills to pay and which ones to wait on. Because if someone doesn't pay the rent someone doesn't get paid.
- I am happy to fix a roof. If the roof is actually leaking.
- There are years we have made a profit. There are years we haven't made a profit.
- In the past year, I have lowered rents on five of my homes. The economy warranted it. In every case I am happy with my choice of tenants (even Mrs. Spring).
- If something on a rental home fails (plumbing, heating, etc.), we fix it. We put our tenant's comfort in front of our own. I have gone without purchasing a dryer and living room furniture because I wanted to make sure my renters had what they needed.
- I will bend over backwards for a tenant. And have. My tenants tend to be long-term because of this. In the month of February, I had TWO former tenants call me asking if they can rent from me again. I get about a call a month from someone who heard about me and wants to know if I have anything available. I believe this stems from the fact that I am not a slumlord. And to my knowledge, my tenants don't feel exploited.
Friday, February 26, 2010
And Justice for All
It seems that Facebook Debbie got her day in court a while ago. You can read about Facebook Debbie here and here if you are so inclined.
Though she didn't exactly say what the outcome of her court date was, she did write about how she was still fuming over her "sleazy" landlord. She mentioned the judge's eyes were "clouded" and he was "influenced by the wealth of the landlord." From what I gather, justice was served.
She made a lot of other derogatory comments about how she was ripped off by the landlord and some general comments about those of us who own rental properties only doing it for our self-interest (which I suppose is true) and to make "millions of the backs of others." Incidentally, I would like to see those millions she was talking about.
Her friends had a few other random comments of a similar nature. There was no point in posting myself. I was pretty sure they had no interest in reading a dissenting opinion. Perhaps they can contact me directly if they want to know how much work goes into managing a rental. But I doubt it. After all, I am the rich, money-grubbing, sleazy landlord who is rolling in my millions.
Though she didn't exactly say what the outcome of her court date was, she did write about how she was still fuming over her "sleazy" landlord. She mentioned the judge's eyes were "clouded" and he was "influenced by the wealth of the landlord." From what I gather, justice was served.
She made a lot of other derogatory comments about how she was ripped off by the landlord and some general comments about those of us who own rental properties only doing it for our self-interest (which I suppose is true) and to make "millions of the backs of others." Incidentally, I would like to see those millions she was talking about.
Her friends had a few other random comments of a similar nature. There was no point in posting myself. I was pretty sure they had no interest in reading a dissenting opinion. Perhaps they can contact me directly if they want to know how much work goes into managing a rental. But I doubt it. After all, I am the rich, money-grubbing, sleazy landlord who is rolling in my millions.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Random Bama
I finally booked my trip. So far, I know I want to pop in on a few tenants and say hello. I really want to see this roof leak Ms. Shirley is fussing about. However, I am not anxious to meet Ms. Shirley. Mr. 114 tells me she has a boyfriend living there that she has never mentioned to me.
I will also be driving by a few other homes where I really have no compunction to meet the tenants. Mr. Green my tenant who is always looking for some obscure broken thing at this home is not someone I want to get to know. I figure if I were to show up, he and his mother-in-law (who lives there as well) will probably hit me with a laundry list of items they want me to repair. I am not against repairing them if they are legitimately broken. I am against being railroaded.
_________________________________________________
Attorney Jon and I are playing phone tag over a minor situation that came up this week. However, I find that I am hesitant to call him back because I am so intimidated by him. I am just not worthy.
_________________________________________________
I am almost done with tax document collection. I have breakfast set up with Diamond Jim for next week. As of Tuesday morning, we had already covered all tax-related questions. So, I am guessing next week will be a social visit.
I will also be driving by a few other homes where I really have no compunction to meet the tenants. Mr. Green my tenant who is always looking for some obscure broken thing at this home is not someone I want to get to know. I figure if I were to show up, he and his mother-in-law (who lives there as well) will probably hit me with a laundry list of items they want me to repair. I am not against repairing them if they are legitimately broken. I am against being railroaded.
_________________________________________________
Attorney Jon and I are playing phone tag over a minor situation that came up this week. However, I find that I am hesitant to call him back because I am so intimidated by him. I am just not worthy.
_________________________________________________
I am almost done with tax document collection. I have breakfast set up with Diamond Jim for next week. As of Tuesday morning, we had already covered all tax-related questions. So, I am guessing next week will be a social visit.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Tax Season
Marty Sunshine and I own a corporation and three LLCs. Additionally, I am self employed. When it comes to filling out our tax forms, we haven't done a 1040 EZ form in eons. I am guessing I am competent enough to muddle my way through the mountains of tax forms necessary and figure things out myself. But I only have until April 15. Or, more likely, October 15 (if I file an extension).
Though Bliz has a variety of talents, including walking on water (especially because it is raining a lot where she is), she politely and assertively refuses to handle my tax preparation. Yes, she helps me with taxes by putting everything in nice, organized profit and loss columns. She is invaluable when it comes to navigating Wells Fargo's web site and faxing me the mortgage interest statements necessary for the IRS. But, she draws the line on organizing all the expanded data that goes with my tax season preparation.
If she did, it would be phone calls like this:
Bliz: "What do you have a receipt dated June 16 for $4.18 from the grocery store?"
Me: "Oh that! I bought eight stamps and a Dr. Pepper. I think. Can't we write off the Dr. Pepper under entertainment?"
Bliz: "Put it under supplies. Here's my bill. That will be $500 an hour."
I am guessing she feels tedium should be saved for more productive tasks.
This past week I have sorted, sifted and cursed through a small tropical rain forest of papers getting everything together for Diamond Jim. I have everything I need except one mortgage interest statement document that our former business partner, Vance, happens to have. Marty Sunshine is tasked with hunting this one down.
There are those who question my organizational skills. But really! I have a system. I have a spreadsheet that itemizes every receipt I acquired in 2009--whether for business or personal. Because I have a home office, I can write off a portion of my pest control, electric bill and pool maintenance. I can write off my Home Depot receipts if I so desire.
Why go through all this? Because every tax deduction helps. I want my money back so I can do something more interesting with it.
Though Bliz has a variety of talents, including walking on water (especially because it is raining a lot where she is), she politely and assertively refuses to handle my tax preparation. Yes, she helps me with taxes by putting everything in nice, organized profit and loss columns. She is invaluable when it comes to navigating Wells Fargo's web site and faxing me the mortgage interest statements necessary for the IRS. But, she draws the line on organizing all the expanded data that goes with my tax season preparation.
If she did, it would be phone calls like this:
Bliz: "What do you have a receipt dated June 16 for $4.18 from the grocery store?"
Me: "Oh that! I bought eight stamps and a Dr. Pepper. I think. Can't we write off the Dr. Pepper under entertainment?"
Bliz: "Put it under supplies. Here's my bill. That will be $500 an hour."
I am guessing she feels tedium should be saved for more productive tasks.
This past week I have sorted, sifted and cursed through a small tropical rain forest of papers getting everything together for Diamond Jim. I have everything I need except one mortgage interest statement document that our former business partner, Vance, happens to have. Marty Sunshine is tasked with hunting this one down.
There are those who question my organizational skills. But really! I have a system. I have a spreadsheet that itemizes every receipt I acquired in 2009--whether for business or personal. Because I have a home office, I can write off a portion of my pest control, electric bill and pool maintenance. I can write off my Home Depot receipts if I so desire.
Why go through all this? Because every tax deduction helps. I want my money back so I can do something more interesting with it.
Monday, February 22, 2010
The "Roof Leak"
Ms. Shirley and I are in month two of the water leak drama.
Here's how it stands. Ms. Shirley lives in a 10 year old home. The bonus room--where the offending water leak resides--is an unfinished room above her garage. The ceiling is finished; the walls are studs. The floor is plywood. There is a window overlooking the front yard. This room is an Alabama home's answer to an attic space. Ms. Shirley uses this room for storage and as a playroom for her son.
According to Ms. Shirley, there is a "wet" spot on the floor in this room. According to Mr. 114 (her next door neighbor and my some-time handyman) there is no evidence of a soft spot or discoloration in the finished ceiling. There are no missing roof tiles. There are no pipes in the floor or ceiling below or above this spot that might be leaking. There are no roof vents above this spot where there might be a flashing issue. The spot is not near the window, thus Mr. 114 came to the conclusion her son spilled something on the floor and it discolored the plywood.
Over the course of time Ms. Shirley has lived in my home, Mr. 114 has told me a few things about her. For example, once she came zipping into Mr. 114's driveway, laying on the horn of her car until Mr. 114 came out the door. There was a frog on her driveway and she needed Mr. 114 to remove it. Apparently Ms. Shirley is terrified of critters.
I was also told by Mr. 114 that Ms. Shirley once asked Mr. 114 if he thought I would replace the stove for her. Why? Because her electric bill was $300 one month. Mr. 114 (who told me about this after it was over with) explained that it wasn't likely to happen and went over to see if he could figure out why her electric bill was so high. First, the air conditioner was running and the house was freezing. Second, the attic/bonus room door was open, allowing the cool air to escape. Mr. 114 suggested a couple of energy-saving modifications and voila! Ms. Shirley's bill was reduced the following month.
I am also told Ms. Shirley doesn't like dust, mold or dirt. All of which sets her into a bit of a frenzy. Not liking animals or dirt are wonderful traits to have in a tenant. Except when there is a discrepancy about a water leak.
Part of me is thinking Ms. Shirley wants out and is going to eventually scream "toxic mold" because of this "water leak." Part of me thinks she really feels there is an issue. There is no part of me that feels this leak is legitimate.
Ms. Shirley has gone so far as to call a roofer, tell the roofer I AM OUT OF TOWN AND HAVE NOT SEEN THIS and could she get a quote. The roofer told her I could have insurance pay for the roof and he could put it on as soon as possible. Even if there is a roof leak, the house certainly doesn't need a new roof. I would think it might need a shingle or two at the most. If that.
I explained to Ms. Shirley that I have an insurance deductible, so the roof isn't "free." If my insurances rates go up, I have to increase the rent (she is month-to-month). I also explained that a roofer's job is to put a new roof on--not to just check to see if it needs to be fixed. They don't get paid unless there is work to do. Hence, they look for work.
"But these people are with the Better Business Bureau. And, they are Christian," she said. I didn't point out I had a "Christian" pastor trash my home years ago. There was no point.
I reminded her that Mr. 114 came and poked around on my behalf last month. "He didn't really look hard." she said. Mr. 114 could have torn the house to shreds and put it back together again and Ms. Shirley would have discounted that.
I am certainly willing to admit when I am wrong. She is over there and she would know if there is a leak better than me. But it just isn't adding up. I am putting paying a visit to Ms. Shirley's home on my to-do list for my hypothetical trip to Birmingham. I will check it out for myself.
If there is a leak, Mr. 114 can fix it.
Here's how it stands. Ms. Shirley lives in a 10 year old home. The bonus room--where the offending water leak resides--is an unfinished room above her garage. The ceiling is finished; the walls are studs. The floor is plywood. There is a window overlooking the front yard. This room is an Alabama home's answer to an attic space. Ms. Shirley uses this room for storage and as a playroom for her son.
According to Ms. Shirley, there is a "wet" spot on the floor in this room. According to Mr. 114 (her next door neighbor and my some-time handyman) there is no evidence of a soft spot or discoloration in the finished ceiling. There are no missing roof tiles. There are no pipes in the floor or ceiling below or above this spot that might be leaking. There are no roof vents above this spot where there might be a flashing issue. The spot is not near the window, thus Mr. 114 came to the conclusion her son spilled something on the floor and it discolored the plywood.
Over the course of time Ms. Shirley has lived in my home, Mr. 114 has told me a few things about her. For example, once she came zipping into Mr. 114's driveway, laying on the horn of her car until Mr. 114 came out the door. There was a frog on her driveway and she needed Mr. 114 to remove it. Apparently Ms. Shirley is terrified of critters.
I was also told by Mr. 114 that Ms. Shirley once asked Mr. 114 if he thought I would replace the stove for her. Why? Because her electric bill was $300 one month. Mr. 114 (who told me about this after it was over with) explained that it wasn't likely to happen and went over to see if he could figure out why her electric bill was so high. First, the air conditioner was running and the house was freezing. Second, the attic/bonus room door was open, allowing the cool air to escape. Mr. 114 suggested a couple of energy-saving modifications and voila! Ms. Shirley's bill was reduced the following month.
I am also told Ms. Shirley doesn't like dust, mold or dirt. All of which sets her into a bit of a frenzy. Not liking animals or dirt are wonderful traits to have in a tenant. Except when there is a discrepancy about a water leak.
Part of me is thinking Ms. Shirley wants out and is going to eventually scream "toxic mold" because of this "water leak." Part of me thinks she really feels there is an issue. There is no part of me that feels this leak is legitimate.
Ms. Shirley has gone so far as to call a roofer, tell the roofer I AM OUT OF TOWN AND HAVE NOT SEEN THIS and could she get a quote. The roofer told her I could have insurance pay for the roof and he could put it on as soon as possible. Even if there is a roof leak, the house certainly doesn't need a new roof. I would think it might need a shingle or two at the most. If that.
I explained to Ms. Shirley that I have an insurance deductible, so the roof isn't "free." If my insurances rates go up, I have to increase the rent (she is month-to-month). I also explained that a roofer's job is to put a new roof on--not to just check to see if it needs to be fixed. They don't get paid unless there is work to do. Hence, they look for work.
"But these people are with the Better Business Bureau. And, they are Christian," she said. I didn't point out I had a "Christian" pastor trash my home years ago. There was no point.
I reminded her that Mr. 114 came and poked around on my behalf last month. "He didn't really look hard." she said. Mr. 114 could have torn the house to shreds and put it back together again and Ms. Shirley would have discounted that.
I am certainly willing to admit when I am wrong. She is over there and she would know if there is a leak better than me. But it just isn't adding up. I am putting paying a visit to Ms. Shirley's home on my to-do list for my hypothetical trip to Birmingham. I will check it out for myself.
If there is a leak, Mr. 114 can fix it.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Another Fabulous Business Meeting with Diamond Jim
Diamond Jim, my CPA, is the only man in the world I will consider waking up for long before the chickens are even moving. Every now and then we meet at Cindy's Cafe, a few miles from my home and his office to visit over eggs and hash browns.
Thursday's business meeting included the following topics: the status of the public schools in Greenville SC, tough love tactics for drug abusing children, theology, C.S. Lewis, whether or not the Diamondbacks have enough salary to offer Mark Reynolds and Justin Upton long-term contracts and why some people insist standardize testing on young children is necessary.
As usual we discussed taxes in the parking lot as we were saying good-bye.
Thursday's business meeting included the following topics: the status of the public schools in Greenville SC, tough love tactics for drug abusing children, theology, C.S. Lewis, whether or not the Diamondbacks have enough salary to offer Mark Reynolds and Justin Upton long-term contracts and why some people insist standardize testing on young children is necessary.
As usual we discussed taxes in the parking lot as we were saying good-bye.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Lunch with Mr. Partner
I had lunch with Mr. Partner on Wednesday. Though this can sometimes cause indigestion, Wednesday's lunch was pretty amicable.
I should preface this with Mr. Partner and I are pretty friendly in general. We had a history a few years ago with him exploding about something completely out of my control and me telling him where he could go and what he could do when he got there in a very un-Southern way. Since then Mr. Partner and I have practiced levels of détente, with me still holding a teeny-tiny (or enormous) bit of a grudge.
Lunch was pleasant enough, given we were going through last year's financials--which were anything but pleasant. He had a few questions. I had reasonable answers. I hit him up for our LLC paying part of my expenses for my upcoming (and thus far, unscheduled--it is SNOWING over there people!) Birmingham trip.
I was able to tell him all of our tenants are behaving. He gave me kudos for working through the issues with Ms. Kathy. He agreed that we did the right thing for Mrs. Sherwood--and was even willing to buy her a stove if she changes her mind. Ms. Angie is owed some work. She will get that done, now that I know Mr. Partner is committed to paying for his half.
And, in a broad-sweeping gesture, he suggested I make sure I pay myself for the work I have been doing. Um... about that... As soon as the money becomes available, you bet I will!
I gave him my action plan for fixing our under-capitalized issues. He nodded, not really agreeing or disagreeing. It doesn't matter. I am working on fixing that either way.
It is nice to have lunch with Mr. Partner when we aren't in the midst of chaos. Lunch tastes better and digests more easily.
I should preface this with Mr. Partner and I are pretty friendly in general. We had a history a few years ago with him exploding about something completely out of my control and me telling him where he could go and what he could do when he got there in a very un-Southern way. Since then Mr. Partner and I have practiced levels of détente, with me still holding a teeny-tiny (or enormous) bit of a grudge.
Lunch was pleasant enough, given we were going through last year's financials--which were anything but pleasant. He had a few questions. I had reasonable answers. I hit him up for our LLC paying part of my expenses for my upcoming (and thus far, unscheduled--it is SNOWING over there people!) Birmingham trip.
I was able to tell him all of our tenants are behaving. He gave me kudos for working through the issues with Ms. Kathy. He agreed that we did the right thing for Mrs. Sherwood--and was even willing to buy her a stove if she changes her mind. Ms. Angie is owed some work. She will get that done, now that I know Mr. Partner is committed to paying for his half.
And, in a broad-sweeping gesture, he suggested I make sure I pay myself for the work I have been doing. Um... about that... As soon as the money becomes available, you bet I will!
I gave him my action plan for fixing our under-capitalized issues. He nodded, not really agreeing or disagreeing. It doesn't matter. I am working on fixing that either way.
It is nice to have lunch with Mr. Partner when we aren't in the midst of chaos. Lunch tastes better and digests more easily.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)